About Zestus : Mm... Uni student from Tokyo who reads FML's when bored in the morning
Hi.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27026) - you deserved it (2017)
On 12/06/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by Rash (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I noticed an old bell at the bar so I rang it. It turns out that when you ring the bell, you buy shots for the whole bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11316) - you deserved it (31773)
On 12/05/2011 at 12:41am - money - by Christina - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I learned that my hairdo must resemble a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17207) - you deserved it (4870)
On 12/02/2011 at 12:14am - animals - by inpain - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend came home, chugged a beer, and passed out in our bed without saying hello or goodnight to me. I've been on vacation for a week and was hoping to cuddle. But no, if I try to touch him, he hits me and growls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (4671)
On 11/29/2011 at 3:00am - love - by LadyDean - United States (North Dakota)
Today, I caught my mother trying to text on her iPhone, with her nipple. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31493) - you deserved it (2260)
On 11/27/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21270) - you deserved it (6508)
On 11/26/2011 at 3:50pm - love - by Rich (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I shaved half my eyebrow off trying to shave my uni-brow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12420) - you deserved it (19571)
On 11/26/2011 at 11:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25281) - you deserved it (11773)
On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9353) - you deserved it (42220)
Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22785) - you deserved it (2663)
On 11/24/2011 at 5:35am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, "Community" was pulled from its mid-season lineup, with plans to hopefully put it back on the schedule at some unknown time. It will probably be canceled. Meanwhile, "Whitney" is still on the air and doing fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18942) - you deserved it (5108)
On 11/15/2011 at 5:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, as a support worker, I spent 45 minutes making various attempts to calm a violent autistic kid. Just as soon as I was sure the crisis was over, he beat me as hard as he could with the "Things I Can Do When I'm Mad" book I'd given him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18223) - you deserved it (2318)
On 11/14/2011 at 8:37am - work - by metallifreak44 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found an old jock strap in my tuba. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18347) - you deserved it (2737)
On 11/14/2011 at 8:23am - misc - by jocksblow - United States
Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12496) - you deserved it (39342)
Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22767) - you deserved it (1763)
On 11/13/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
