About Ugi : Dazed and confused.
Ugi's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Picture this FML
You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Ugi's favorite FMLs
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
by -_- / 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
by Anonymous / 03/26/2011 at 2:24am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 1:54am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by sylverster / 03/15/2011 at 8:37am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by Username / 03/12/2011 at 12:10am / United States / Intimacy
by hackling fellow / 03/10/2011 at 8:17am / Miscellaneous
by ouch / 03/08/2011 at 10:50am / United Kingdom (London) / Health
by Ldp56 / 02/25/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
by PrestonW / 02/09/2011 at 10:53am / Miscellaneous
Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML
by Username / 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I got pulled over by a cop. Since my window wasn't working, I opened the door, causing him to run towards me with a drawn gun. He then had a go at me with his night stick. After realizing my window was broken, he laughed and let me off with a warning. FML
by NotoriousSRJ / 01/28/2011 at 10:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by roo / 01/27/2011 at 11:48am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by knickersdontfit / 01/26/2011 at 12:44pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health
Today, I was released from jail. I had helped a three year old girl get up after falling on a wet floor at the mall last night when the security guards tasered me. Only this morning did they tell me they had mistaken me for a child molester that looks a little bit like me. FML
by Anonymous / 01/25/2011 at 4:15pm / United States / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…
- Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and… Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis… Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating…