About Ugi : Dazed and confused.
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Ugi's favorite FMLs
by Mega_bug / 06/16/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML
by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love
Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML
by bronco_lover89 / 05/21/2012 at 9:05pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by 23yearoldtoddler / 05/18/2012 at 10:13am / United States / Kids
Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML
by FML / 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm / Finland / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Kids
Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML
by quirrus / 05/07/2012 at 5:42am / United States / Intimacy
by flustered / 05/06/2012 at 10:57am / United States (South Dakota) / Kids
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to the sight of a zucchini and a condom on my bedside table, along with a note saying "I know it's tough being single." Apparently my mom has boundary issues, my dad will laugh at anything, and the fact I just got dumped means nothing. FML
by Madeline Lee / 04/09/2012 at 5:34pm / France (Aquitaine) / Intimacy
by Tanner / 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Chey / 03/22/2012 at 6:13pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML
by brooke / 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by xX_nsn_Xx / 02/03/2012 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by JohhnyKeroscene / 02/01/2012 at 7:21am / United States / Miscellaneous