Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ugi

Search for a member

Ugi

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6766
  • Number of comments : 1065
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Ugi : Dazed and confused.

Ugi's page activity

Visits<b>TheNoobySpartan</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 5:09pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:26pm<b>Le_Rabbid</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 3:59pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:27pm<b>larosiee</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 12:12am<b>mgrazi99</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:36pm<b>JesusFreak227</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 11:12pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:40am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:42pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 10:10pm<b>Terzy</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:35am<b>lemurman108</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:11pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 9:20pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 12:58am<b>Owlnight321</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 1:03am<b>thenick_m</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 11:59pm<b>codazombie</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 5:07pm<b>NadiaDominique</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 2:04pm

Ugi's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of Ugi's badges

Ugi's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML

#2116644
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63041) - you deserved it (3493)

On 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by lm (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
437 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31988) - you deserved it (141606)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

#2019724
641 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27721) - you deserved it (273626)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

#1869904
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11772) - you deserved it (78326)

On 05/12/2009 at 10:23am - misc - by Permafucked (woman) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

#1837844
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (93176) - you deserved it (5100)

On 05/11/2009 at 5:09am - misc - by mistake (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I took my lunch break to buy my mom a pretty orchid. I took it to her apartment (to which I have a key), placed it on her coffee table with her card, and went back to work, pleased with my surprise. She called me later to ask why I got her a stick in a pot of dirt. Her cat ate the orchid. FML

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

#1800346
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58531) - you deserved it (5652)

On 05/10/2009 at 1:05am - kids - by sucksforme. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my mom if she thought I was straight. She looked at me and said "Well, that's really up to you honey. But your father and I would still love you." I was asking if she thought I had parked straight. FML

#1625172
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48997) - you deserved it (11541)

On 05/04/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in the grocery store buying a few things. A sales associate came over the intercom system saying, "Attention Safeway customers. If you drive a blue Subaru, it's rolling into 18th Ave." Everyone laughed except me. I forgot to set the brake. FML

#1582380
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17789) - you deserved it (43734)

On 05/03/2009 at 1:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

#1550059
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29668) - you deserved it (269428)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:21am - health - by breathalizard (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML

#1524498
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89579) - you deserved it (14003)

On 05/01/2009 at 1:40pm - intimacy - by chelle (woman) - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: