Ugi

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Ugi

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12553
  • Number of comments : 1065
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Ugi : Dazed and confused.

Ugi's page activity

Visits<b>cuz803</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 7:44pm<b>Oh_No_Not_Him</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 1:38pm<b>CamBamShamDaMan</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 9:11am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:18am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:25pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 4:57am<b>david66</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 3:40pm<b>dubsdb</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:19am<b>ThirteenThirteen</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:10pm<b>anujt360</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 3:23am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:12pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 8:03pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 12:31pm<b>amellll</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 9:25am<b>seetei</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:04pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 11:06am<b>ThatDamHuntress</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 5:49am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 10:00pm

Fucked!<b>cuz803</b> - the 08/27/2016 at 1:44am<b>dubsdb</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 5:19pm<b>anujt360</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 9:23am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 10:12pm

Ugi's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of Ugi's badges

Ugi's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML

by a / 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the mall blasting music. I was wearing a nice shirt, and had my iPod in my breast pocket. I noticed a cute girl smiling at me, so I smiled back and as she started to walk over, I turned down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FML

by zero_minded12 / 05/20/2009 at 11:08pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML

by lm / 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

by karmasabitch / 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

by Permafucked / 05/12/2009 at 10:23am / United States (South Dakota) / Love

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

by mistake / 05/11/2009 at 5:09am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my lunch break to buy my mom a pretty orchid. I took it to her apartment (to which I have a key), placed it on her coffee table with her card, and went back to work, pleased with my surprise. She called me later to ask why I got her a stick in a pot of dirt. Her cat ate the orchid. FML

by progressiveboink / 05/11/2009 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

by sucksforme. / 05/10/2009 at 1:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

by Rhyno / 05/05/2009 at 11:37am / United States (New York) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked my mom if she thought I was straight. She looked at me and said "Well, that's really up to you honey. But your father and I would still love you." I was asking if she thought I had parked straight. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2009 at 12:51pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was in the grocery store buying a few things. A sales associate came over the intercom system saying, "Attention Safeway customers. If you drive a blue Subaru, it's rolling into 18th Ave." Everyone laughed except me. I forgot to set the brake. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 1:35am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation

Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

by breathalizard / 05/02/2009 at 2:21am / United States (North Dakota) / Health

Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML

by chelle / 05/01/2009 at 1:40pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy