About Ugi : Dazed and confused.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17567) - you deserved it (2585)
On 09/02/2012 at 1:34pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19990) - you deserved it (4783)
On 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I had forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5459) - you deserved it (22100)
On 08/27/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by dgilbs - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had to pee so bad that I ran downstairs with no glasses on and stumbled into the bathroom, half blind. I sat down on the toilet and realized just a little late that my older sister and her boyfriend were having sex in the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25300) - you deserved it (1985)
On 08/26/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29412) - you deserved it (7938) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version
Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18071) - you deserved it (2085) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my girlfriend's phone was stolen. I have no idea who I've been sexting the entire afternoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20824) - you deserved it (5847)
On 08/21/2012 at 11:29am - intimacy - by Sexting (man) - United States
Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25938) - you deserved it (3336)
On 08/13/2012 at 8:19am - intimacy - by hmmmm (woman) - Australia
Today, out of curiosity, I measured the length of my penis whilst in the shower. A couple of hours later, my father called me downstairs to show me something. Turns out I left the ruler on top of the shower tree. He won't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6694) - you deserved it (22356)
On 07/25/2012 at 9:11pm - intimacy - by Infiltrator4444 - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12313) - you deserved it (17685)
On 07/16/2012 at 10:38am - kids - by oops123 (woman) - United States
Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5409) - you deserved it (15556)
On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28899) - you deserved it (1138)
Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18563) - you deserved it (2749)
On 06/22/2012 at 3:28am - work - by me - United States (Indiana)
Today, I got into a huge fight with a girl at school. My mom and dad decided to punish me by letting my three older brothers pick out my wardrobe for the next week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18539) - you deserved it (13073)
On 06/19/2012 at 12:38pm - misc - by Shelby - United States (Illinois)
Today, while giving my fiancé a hand-job, my ring got stuck in his pubes. We had to awkwardly get to the kitchen to get scissors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16541) - you deserved it (4721)
On 06/16/2012 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by Mega_bug - United States (Washington)
Monday 20 May 2013
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