Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About TrentF13 : I enjoy: Pokemon, metal, hardstyle, techno, Melbourne shuffle, large dogs (German shepherds in particular), lazy days, Skyrim, Naruto, air conditioning, ramen!!! (but not by Nissin... It has to be Maruchan), little kids that behave, sewing, making pizza at Little Caesars, cooking in general, running, LONGBOARDING! (my passion), drawing, MLPFIM, showers, sex (who doesn't?), fighting, sparring, dancing... And more that I can't think of right now.
I am: Male, bisexual, single, hungry, funny, annoying, smart, stupid, clever, strong as hell, 5'11", fast, not very good looking, and some other stuff... I'm sure.
I dislike: the anti of things listed in the "I enjoy" section.
I am not: What I am not.
If you're looking to chat, message me. My phone number is 4062148842. Text me.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML
Today, I was forced to listen and politely nod with a smile on my face, as my boss droned on and on, explaining that everything in the universe is slowly getting bigger, aside from him, because he's never felt so short before. FML
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML
Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML
Thursday 10 April 2014