Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Online | Search for a member
This member hasn't filled in the description.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if looool I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife then looked at me an giggled. FML
Today, My Grlfriend Was Feeling Down Cuz She Has Putted On Some Weight. I Tried To Make Her Feel Better By Showing Her I Can Still Pick Her Up. I Can, An I Was Even Able To Hide The Fact That I Shat Myself Doing It. I'm So Romantic. Real FML
Today, While Driving Home, Mah 3-year-old Daughter Told Me She Had To Poop. I Told Her That She Would Have To Wait Until We Got Home. When We Got Home, She Pulled Down Her Pants An Shat On The Floor, Because, "I'm Home Now." FML
Today, and every other night since new nieghbors moved in two weeks ago, thier cat has been standing outside house meowing constantly up at window, where cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML
Today , I Went To Mah Bedroom For Some Alone Time While Mah Daughter Watched TV. I Didn't Realize That Mah IPad Was Still Connected To The Apple TV , Until I Hit Play On Some Porn And Heard A Scream From The Other Room. FML
Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work wat a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML
Friday 27 March 2015