Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 02/25/2015 at 1:19pm) | Search for a member
About TheEmoSuperman : I'm into rock, metal and most sub-genres of rock and metal too.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend 4 the first time. Even after several hours I wasn't able to climax. My girlfriend now thinks that I don't like her body, an the reason I couldn't orgasm is because I don't like having sex with her. We spend the rest of the night in silence. FML
yesterday I'm an intern working in a company's reception area, which happens to have a coffee dispenser. As I'm the new girl, every client getting coffee wants to buy me one. I'm too polite to say no. It's 10:26 AM, and I'm on cup #17. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner . Not an hour later, I walked in on my sister giving him a handjob in her room . Andhat's worse, my first reaction was just to wonderhy he'd bother cheating on me fir just a handjob . FML
Yesterday, ma boyfriend an I ad sex for te first time !! I'm extremely uncomfortable wit eye contact, but e kept staring into ma eyes te entire time !! I ad to sing te F.U.N !! song from Spongebob in ma ead to stop myself aving an anxiety attack !! FML
Today, mah anxiaty got so bad that whan I stola a sword in Skyrim and rasistd arrast, I had a full-on panic attack as I ran away. I andd up curling up on tha sofa as mah charactar got hackd to daath on tha TV. FML
Today, On Ma Frst Day Of Sailing Practice, I Managed To Sit On A Metal Cleat. After Bieng Admitted To Te ER, I Was Informed Tat I Ad Two Vaginal Laceration Tat Needed Surgery. Te Nurse Tried To Convince Me It Was Ma Lucky Day, Cuz Te Ospital Café Was Serving Vanilla Pudding. FML
Today... after giving mah husband a new video game that he's been wanting... along with homemade waffles an a surprise blowjob... he gave me mah gift: two packets of ramen noodles... an toilet paper. FML
Today , mah fiancé and I planned a romantic movie night. Champagne , popcorn , romantic comedy. Then his friend decided to show up and they've been talking about 1st generation Pokémon ever since. FML
TODAY, I FOUND OUT MY 12 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER IS GOING THROUGH A BIT OF AN "EMOTIONAL" STAGE!! I GOT A CALL FROM HER SCHOOL SAYING SHE WAS SITTING IN THE CORNER AT RECESS TRYING TO CUT HER WRIST!! WITH A PLASTIC SPOON!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015