TheCerealKiller

Search for a member

Offline (23 hours ago)

TheCerealKiller

24Fucked!

TheCerealKiller
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2717
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

About TheCerealKiller : I am a serial cereal killer.

TheCerealKiller's page activity

Visits<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 9:13pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 1:01am<b>wafflelover</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:55pm<b>sammy011</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 8:02pm<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 11:38am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:06am<b>TheOneButNotOnly</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 3:30pm<b>Wontonfon</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:38pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 5:56am<b>zr11990</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:17am<b>AcidBurn84</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:27pm<b>dman30</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 10:02am<b>dcam13</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:10am<b>edmunson</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:50am<b>brittanyleann72</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:39pm<b>marshm610</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:38pm<b>BenHalf</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 10:49pm<b>Tenker</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 10:47pm

Fucked!<b>wafflelover</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 3:52pm<b>TheOneButNotOnly</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 9:30pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 11:56am<b>dcam13</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 10:11am<b>Tenker</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:47am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:42am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 7:12pm<b>pratikp03</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 3:45pm<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 1:56pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 12:50pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 12:36pm<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:12am<b>Envy22</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 1:32am<b>arano</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 5:04pm<b>Candygrl987</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:41am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 10:26pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 6:17pm<b>ReverseCarb</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 6:10pm

TheCerealKiller's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of TheCerealKiller's badges

TheCerealKiller's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend, and ended up sitting next to this girl who wouldn't stop sneezing. Grossed out, I asked my boyfriend if we could switch seats. After doing so, the girl immediately stopped sneezing and started flirting with him. FML

by Hana / 03/23/2012 at 3:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

by brooke / 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

by me / 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

by starboy / 03/10/2012 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the wall and threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML

by rapper in training / 02/10/2012 at 8:02pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML

by ThinZ / 12/23/2011 at 7:26pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

by girlshavepenises / 06/28/2011 at 2:39am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by a "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. And we continued to chat. FML

by IPityTheStool / 06/09/2011 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, I witnessed two women in a catfight, ripping clothes off each other. This would have been great if the two women weren't my mom and my grandma. FML

by Danny / 04/25/2011 at 9:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2011 at 12:10am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 6:43am / France (Alsace) / Love