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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71433) - you deserved it (5444)
On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -
Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19673) - you deserved it (39431)
On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14166) - you deserved it (27343)
On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -
Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7417) - you deserved it (91243)
Today, I went on a date with a girl. We drove separately and met at the restaurant. Over the course of two hours she drank a gallon and a half of beer, then her boyfriend picked her up because she was too drunk to drive home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29287) - you deserved it (4664)
On 04/11/2011 at 11:20am - love - by sandyhome (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I discovered that my girlfriend can only orgasm when we have sex to gospel music. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42574) - you deserved it (4556)
On 04/03/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by cantgetup (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was giving a strip tease over Skype to my boyfriend. My mom walked in mid-way through, took a long look at me, said hi to my boyfriend, and walked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12613) - you deserved it (34364)
On 04/02/2011 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by lovely321 (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33064) - you deserved it (6145)
On 03/30/2011 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out that using a certain hand sanitizer as masturbation lube will put you in the hospital and result in having to wear an adult diaper for a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11099) - you deserved it (53541)
On 03/29/2011 at 2:28am - intimacy - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I asked my friend what form of birth control she used the first time she had sex. She stared at me like I was from another planet and said, "You can't get pregnant the first time..." This moron is my best friend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38931) - you deserved it (6656)
On 03/26/2011 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Thatslife (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)
Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14051) - you deserved it (64595)
On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39295) - you deserved it (6353)
On 03/12/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML
I agree, your life sucks (10954) - you deserved it (36938)
On 03/07/2011 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by lolzboss - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32236) - you deserved it (8715)
On 03/06/2011 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10583) - you deserved it (31301)
On 03/01/2011 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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