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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 January 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5272
  • Number of comments : 208
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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TechFire's favorite FMLs

Today, after declining an amazing job offer that pays more than double what I make now in order to accept a promotion my boss offered me if I stayed, I asked when I would receive the promotion and pay raise. She snorted and said, "You thought I was serious about that?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (30525) - you deserved it (9486)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:37am - work - by Fackwork (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28359) - you deserved it (1826)

On 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had to get the manager of a grocery store to explain to his employee how coupons work. The employee had refused to accept the coupons I was using, for fear that, "they will be deducted from my paycheck." FML

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51449) - you deserved it (4803)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML


I agree, your life sucks (26192) - you deserved it (2907)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22645) - you deserved it (2426)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while at work, I found a dead dog in a freezer. Turns out it's been in there for over 3 years. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28677) - you deserved it (2168)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:27pm - animals - by Scarred (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the world did not used to be black and white. It was just the pictures that were. She still doesn't believe me. She's eighteen. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28636) - you deserved it (2524)

On 03/14/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by CierraJordan - United States (Utah)

Today, I was talking to a group of friends about the various problems in Africa. One of them interrupts me and asks with a straight face, "If it's so bad over there, why don't they all just leave?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (24439) - you deserved it (3811)

On 03/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by dumbfriend - United States

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML


I agree, your life sucks (27557) - you deserved it (3318)

On 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16045) - you deserved it (53575)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was debating if I actually do talk to myself. I was having this conversation with myself. FML


Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29351) - you deserved it (2184)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by jess (woman) - United States (Montana)

G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML

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