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Talloz

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Talloz
  • Town/Country : Netherlands
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 February 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 1678
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Talloz's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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Talloz's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

#20632198
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46711) - you deserved it (4063)

On 04/30/2013 at 3:54am - money - by ShowerGirl (woman) - United States

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

#20630276
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43151) - you deserved it (10418)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:51pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I had a big party planned. All but one of the guests cancelled. See you at 7, mom. FML

#20630222
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40433) - you deserved it (2943)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands

Today, I had yet another class with my psychotic, conservative, uber-religious teacher. The "well-known statistic" of today? Over 90% of people who have ever watched porn end up having a divorce due to psychological damage from said porn. FML

#20629742
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34727) - you deserved it (4374)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:32am - intimacy - by WTHChristianSchool (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML

#20629715
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35539) - you deserved it (8751)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:08am - intimacy - by unforgettablee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl and ask her about it. The girl denied it and said she didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me, called me a liar and punched me in the face. FML

#20629579
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20224) - you deserved it (49206)

On 04/29/2013 at 1:26am - love - by bad day Brutus (man) - United States

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

#20628087
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46758) - you deserved it (5752)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia

Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML

#20627067
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55701) - you deserved it (2580)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:30am - misc - by wtfisgoingon (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to explain to a friend that the show writers for Glee did not write "Bohemian Rhapsody" and that Freddie Mercury did not steal the song from them. We're both 17 years old, and she reacted by kicking a chair at me. FML

#20626458
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38227) - you deserved it (2430)

On 04/27/2013 at 11:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my little brother gave me an open jar of peanut butter for my birthday. I'm deathly allergic, and he knows it. Despite his maniacal grin and snickering, my parents said it was an innocent mistake, and grounded me for yelling at him. FML

#20625530
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45818) - you deserved it (2630)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:23pm - health - by stuckwithafamilyofcunts (woman) - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML

#20625307
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47758) - you deserved it (2790)

On 04/27/2013 at 2:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he says I need to learn how to be happy without relying on him. I'm not a clinger, I'm just unhappy because my dad recently passed away, my best friend turned on me, and I lost out on the exchange program of my dreams. FML

#20625067
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48464) - you deserved it (2861)

On 04/27/2013 at 12:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

#20624598
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46623) - you deserved it (2732)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:28am - misc - by whathehell (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, nobody wants to hang out with me due to a nasty rumor that my ex has spread. No one will tell me what was said, because I apparently "know full well" what I did. FML

#20624422
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44536) - you deserved it (2960)

On 04/27/2013 at 1:02am - misc - by dabull (man) - United States



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

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