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Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
I agree, your life sucks (43745) - you deserved it (6031)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (56391) - you deserved it (7991)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (53130) - you deserved it (10733)
On 05/04/2013 at 3:22am - kids - by prostitott -
Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21169) - you deserved it (27692)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:17am - work - by charishard - United States (Texas)
Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41764) - you deserved it (3564)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:30pm - work - by annoyedgirl - United States (Washington)
Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52019) - you deserved it (2694)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands
Today, I was at dance rehearsal. As a male dancer I like to keep the fact that I dance a secret because of the stupid stereotypes male dancers have. This plan was quickly shot down when I discovered I was performing at my school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34377) - you deserved it (4586)
On 05/03/2013 at 8:39pm - misc - by DeActivated (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, I overheard my boyfriend admitting that he's only dating me because having me around "sucks a bit less than fucking my own hand". FML
I agree, your life sucks (43884) - you deserved it (4018)
On 05/03/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany
Today, I gave a big presentation to my class. It included PowerPoint slides and video clips of the country I'd been researching. Another student did a presentation on the same country, except he just read from its Wikipedia page. He practically got a standing ovation. I got a single clap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38407) - you deserved it (2725)
On 05/03/2013 at 12:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going well, and she gave me her name to add on Facebook. Since I didn't have the app, I opened Safari on my phone. It opened to my video from Pornhub I watched yesterday and started playing, on full volume, through the entire bus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22522) - you deserved it (59884)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by acnecream - Finland (Eastern Finland)
Today, marks the third week in which my girlfriend has gone without taking a shower. She does this every so often, taking showers roughly once per month. She's convinced baby wipes will "hold her over". FML
I agree, your life sucks (45236) - you deserved it (7441)
On 05/03/2013 at 1:16am - love - by SingleStrongArm - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML
I agree, your life sucks (52756) - you deserved it (7564)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for cheating on her. Her "proof" was an image of me making out with a girl. Pretty damning, except she loaded it up in Photoshop, where I saw the image layers she'd used to fake the whole thing. I'm not sure what the hell she was thinking either. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46263) - you deserved it (2735)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:16pm - love - by psycho ex (man) - Brazil
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52431) - you deserved it (5565)
On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I'm on holiday in Ghana. After having worn an anklet I bought here for the past two weeks, I was told that it's used by the local prostitutes to advertise their trade. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41139) - you deserved it (6223)
On 05/02/2013 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ghana (Greater Accra)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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