Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Sporkly

Search for a member

Sporkly
  • Town/Country : Ireland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 3 April 1999 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 1409
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Sporkly : Hello friends! I am Jodie and I'm a boring short Irish girl (4'11'') who likes One Piece and maybe other things. I'm very shy and people scare me.
P.S. please ignore the shitty username

Sporkly's last visitors

DetroitDovkakakarotcakemulinazzirosenkrieger223MoelylRababcochinaski7628PancakeSlap

Sporkly's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Sporkly's badges

Sporkly's favorite FMLs

Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML

#20040876
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17651) - you deserved it (9050)

On 08/25/2012 at 11:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

#19806269
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26794) - you deserved it (2700)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML

#19755042
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14608) - you deserved it (3647)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:36pm - health - by miss tomato (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24463) - you deserved it (2608)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took the bus. The old lady next to me almost fell when the driver stopped, but I managed to catch her. Five minutes later, the same thing happened to me. The old lady tried to help me, but I lost my balance and pulled her skirt down. FML

#19667338
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21257) - you deserved it (1841)

On 05/23/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by alexo - United States

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

#19588733
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13998) - you deserved it (3293)

On 05/07/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

#19579357
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9131) - you deserved it (28860)

On 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by mhm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML

#19488517
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8622) - you deserved it (16757)

On 04/18/2012 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

#19391692
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22677) - you deserved it (2731)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that the stream of water that periodically falls onto the ground outside my apartment window isn't actually water. The guy above me regularly pees out of his window onto his balcony. FML

#19366084
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18132) - you deserved it (1328)

On 03/28/2012 at 8:44pm - misc - by deadgrass (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had to yet again tell my mother-in-law that I wasn't going to name my unborn baby "Ermintrude" after her late mother. My husband told me to stop being difficult, and that he agrees that it would be nice. FML

#19326389
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27041) - you deserved it (1944)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:14pm - kids - by futuremum (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML

#19315463
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (2811)

On 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm - misc - by Laura - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

#19246597
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19448) - you deserved it (1620)

On 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML

#19157745
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22945) - you deserved it (5845)

On 02/25/2012 at 12:04am - love - by michellemoyah (woman) - United States (Colorado)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: