About SonOfAMitch : Just a FML user spreading joy to the unfortunate FMLers.
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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9974) - you deserved it (253855)
On 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm - work - by Hairball (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my little sister thought it'd be cool to pierce my nose while I was asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40216) - you deserved it (2658)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:17am - misc - by NoseInPain (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was at home, my mom came and saw me holding what she thought was a glass of beer. She took the glass, threw it and slapped me for drinking it. I was drinking Apple Juice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47387) - you deserved it (2396)
On 08/02/2009 at 12:14pm - misc - by kashish0711 (man) - India (Chandigarh)
Today, I went to TGI Friday's with my crush. At the end of our meal, the waitress gave us mints with the bill. He said something that made me laugh, and I began choking on my mint. After a few coughs, I finally managed to get it out. It hit him in the forehead and landed in his drink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35225) - you deserved it (4281)
On 07/16/2009 at 8:05pm - love - by CityGirl (woman) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I was at the movies with my mom and dad, and the preview to my "My Sisters Keeper" came on. The trailer started out with "Most babies are accidents..." Right as that line was finished my mom elbowed me and laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50651) - you deserved it (3359)
On 06/28/2009 at 2:12am - kids - by A2 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34253) - you deserved it (12092)
On 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm - misc - by meantowheels (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31583) - you deserved it (2754)
On 06/16/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by yourmom (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (73163) - you deserved it (15320)
On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me because he loves toilets. Everyone was sleeping so I went pee but didnt flush. My cat jumped onto the seat and fell in. I had to lift him out and then wash him. He hates water though, so I was scratched by my cat who was dripping with my own pee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34191) - you deserved it (19742)
On 05/04/2009 at 8:37am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (207049) - you deserved it (10106)
On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60398) - you deserved it (8245)
On 05/02/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by systeminitiated (man) - Canada
Today, I was eating a hamburger on the street when a pigeon came down to take a bite. I ran and got 30 birds or so chasing me. My legs were burning, half of my burger was gone, and an entire office building was laughing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45060) - you deserved it (6677)
On 04/22/2009 at 6:40am - animals - by fencernick (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52246) - you deserved it (4636)
On 04/22/2009 at 1:24am - misc - by 11321 (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found my dog, who had been missing for over a month, at the local pound. Clearly it was my dog, she responded to her name and cried when she saw me. However, the woman there told me I could not simply take her, I had to follow through with all policies. I paid $250 to adopt my own dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56582) - you deserved it (913)
On 04/12/2009 at 1:55pm - animals - by anbrown6 - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to a friend's sweet sixteen. Since I didn't know any else at the party I was really happy when the mother told me she sat me next to someone she thought I would have a lot in common with. He ended up being mentally challenged and talked to a sock puppet the whole party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46539) - you deserved it (2807)
On 04/10/2009 at 10:37pm - misc - by NotRetarded (man) - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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