About Snow_Daisy : My whole life could be considered an FML. Truth.
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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53128) - you deserved it (2696)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20301) - you deserved it (2621)
On 09/02/2009 at 5:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I took my puppy outside to play. At one point, she stopped chewing on her toy and ran over to give me a big kiss all over my face and mouth. A few minutes later I realized that her chew toy was actually the dried up carcass of a toad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30721) - you deserved it (5614)
On 08/04/2009 at 7:25pm - health - by toadface (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58571) - you deserved it (4584)
On 06/02/2009 at 7:08am - kids - by fallsdownplenty45 (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44754) - you deserved it (2184)
On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50270) - you deserved it (5201)
On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (212989) - you deserved it (10188)
On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend was really stressed about a guy he works with being a jerk. I told him "if you ignore something long enough, it won't bother you anymore." His response was "I've ignored my herpes for a long time but it still bothers me." We've been having sex for 3 months now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (106535) - you deserved it (14922)
On 03/21/2009 at 3:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (322463) - you deserved it (28022)
On 03/21/2009 at 3:15am - intimacy - by jilted (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my wife of over 20 years told me she wants a divorce because she wants "a change in life". She has had the same mullet hair cut since '84. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66222) - you deserved it (7652)
On 03/20/2009 at 12:45pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched "What are you doing with my panties!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11333) - you deserved it (75065)
On 03/20/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by HughGorgy (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I decided to have sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pockets. Turns out, he had written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML
I agree, your life sucks (107630) - you deserved it (9364)
On 03/19/2009 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by ufhdafuhds (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)
Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65169) - you deserved it (22204)
On 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm - intimacy - by Moanie (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while, and my dad said, "honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57712) - you deserved it (19178)
On 03/12/2009 at 3:49pm - health - by mugs (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I went to a movie with my boyfriend. In the lobby, I asked why the glasses were not working. I said, "Do they only work inside the theater?" My boyfriend replied, "3-D glasses just work inside the movie, everything else in the World is pretty much 3-D." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6994) - you deserved it (96479)
On 02/12/2009 at 1:00am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Monday 17 June 2013
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