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SlytherinSyd

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SlytherinSyd

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 February 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1193
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SlytherinSyd : hey! I'm just here for the laughs. (:

SlytherinSyd's page activity

Visits<b>alliane</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:44am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 10:02pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:49am<b>driftlobster</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:38am<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:37pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 4:54am<b>dk1991</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 8:55am<b>rainyday12345</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 1:12am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 3:50am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:01am<b>reallynow1910</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 9:48am<b>A07</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 1:24am<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 11:54am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 2:43pm<b>JustClaire95</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 8:29am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 8:27pm<b>JustAnotherJose2</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 8:36pm<b>Undecided_Jesus</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 5:47pm

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SlytherinSyd's favorite FMLs

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36458) - you deserved it (89476)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)

Today, while showering, my 3 year old son comes to the bathroom and puts on all my makeup. Once I got out of the shower, I got a camera I had and took a few adorable shots. Afterward, I sent the images to all my friends and family. Then I realized the reflection on the mirror was me fully naked. FML

#807564
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37681) - you deserved it (85470)

On 04/04/2009 at 10:10pm - kids - by heytherexo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

#717975
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24350) - you deserved it (82415)

On 03/31/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Alex (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (197337) - you deserved it (31435)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex and I was on top. I was really into it and in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said "oh, look at the time, I gotta get home". She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

#618347
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84475) - you deserved it (16045)

On 03/26/2009 at 4:37am - intimacy - by crap (man) - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend and I were getting serious. I quickly lied and said no. She then informed me that if things ever heated up that she would take me to get birthcontrol. Wanting birthcontrol, I confessed. In turn she grounded me. I am not allowed to see my boyfriend anymore. FML

#602653
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59805) - you deserved it (25905)

On 03/25/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I gave a campus tour to a group of high school seniors. As I was showing off the dorms, one student asks, "Are these beds sturdy enough for threesomes?" Before I could respond, another kid shouts, "How would he know, I bet the only action he gets in bed is from his left hand." She's correct. FML

#553783
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98153) - you deserved it (10289)

On 03/23/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, at the dinner table my parents were talking to my younger sister about her new boyfriend and how they should be taking it slow. My sister then pointed out that that's not what I do. My dad said, "Believe me I know- your sister's easier to get into than community college." FML

#305736
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66200) - you deserved it (26833)

On 03/13/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I just finished having dinner with my boyfriend, so I leaned over to him and said seductively, "How about some dessert?" Obviously, he didn't catch my tone, because he then looked at me and said, "Babe, you really don't need it." FML

#274634
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66017) - you deserved it (8539)

On 03/11/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by marshmallowssss (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was driving down the road when I got to a red light. I looked over and saw a hot chick in a convertible so I spoke to my window thinking she couldn't hear me "Hey girl, I may have a tiny dick but I make up for it in speed and stamina." She looked over. I forgot about the sunroof. FML

#239452
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8208) - you deserved it (78316)

On 03/08/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by Smash_Mouth - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother told me she didn't want my girlfriend spending the night anymore. I asked why, she said she heard us doing the nasty the night before and I denied it, hoping I could call her bluff. She paused for a moment and moaned EXACTLY like my girlfriend does. FML

#225953
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19634) - you deserved it (60944)

On 03/06/2009 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by ToobyFrank - United States (Missouri)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27357) - you deserved it (94961)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I met a guy at a bar and we went back to my room. We start having sex and about 30 seconds in he stops and says it's not right - he likes me too much for a one night stand. He gives me his number, a kiss on the cheek and leaves. Turns out he already came. I call his phone - wrong number. FML

#139747
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76026) - you deserved it (18753)

On 02/25/2009 at 11:51pm - intimacy - by jsw029 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom decided to give me relationship advice. She told me the key to a happy/successful relationship was "letting your man explore ALL your orifices." FML

#130109
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42700) - you deserved it (3554)

On 02/25/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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