Sexy_Smurf

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Sexy_Smurf

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 31 August 1979 (36 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1709
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Sexy_Smurf : I'm just me, nothing more - nothing less.... I have a gorgeous boyfriend & 2 beautiful children and a little smurf on the way..all of whom I adore. Life is pretty good right now!

Sexy_Smurf's page activity

Visits<b>JayL80</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 1:54am<b>Damafia</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 9:42am<b>zingline89</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 12:13am<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 3:29am<b>yehyeh</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:13am<b>xDochx</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 1:28am<b>grogers311</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 10:17pm<b>missmandersxoxo</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 3:09am<b>regenerate</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 3:15pm<b>Dpac7</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 10:02pm<b>tralala453</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 10:00pm<b>Cloveland99</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 4:51pm<b>sawyercarten</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 8:25am<b>maravenus</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 7:44am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 4:02am<b>holyblahblah</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 4:36pm<b>ThecomingofTan</b> - the 09/10/2012 at 12:20am<b>kiakia0131</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 5:40pm

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Sexy_Smurf's favorite FMLs

Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2012 at 12:29am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids

Today, my pregnant wife broke down in tears over the fact that since moving to Brazil for my job, we don't have regular access to macaroni and cheese. FML

by stupidbullcrêpe / 08/20/2012 at 6:06pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Health

Today, I woke up to an email confirming my membership to a dating site. Turns out my mother is as annoyed by my loveless life as I am. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2012 at 7:29am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Love

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids

Today, I went to my first ever job interview, in a totally stressed out state. The employer's first question was: "What's your name?" I forgot. FML

by Anonyme / 05/29/2012 at 6:19am / Work

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

by sopheeah / 05/29/2012 at 3:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I had to teach my younger brother to shave with a regular disposable razor because our dad uses an electric one and I'm the only other person in the family with enough facial hair to know how to use a razor. I probably would have been proud if I wasn't a girl. FML

by The Bearded Woman / 05/29/2012 at 12:06am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I went to the orthodontist's to get my braces tightened, and I chose baby blue bands. Turns out they make my teeth look extremely yellow. Only a month and a half to go. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2012 at 7:40am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML

by secret_source / 05/17/2012 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after winning a major photography competition with the prize of an expensive workshop with a top photographer, I learned that my crazy stalker has paid the £250 workshop costs, and will travel 5 hours just to be there with me. FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2012 at 6:49am / Egypt / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend started laughing during sex because my boobs are slightly different. He then broke up with me after I pointed out that his nuts aren't exactly even either. FML

by anonymous / 05/14/2012 at 6:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, after 4 days of constipation, I finally pooped. Sadly, I was not on the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2012 at 11:14pm / United States / Health

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

by Andy / 05/12/2012 at 10:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got all my wisdom teeth out. Have you ever thrown up after mouth surgery? Stomach acid in your bloody gum holes is just as fun as it sounds. FML

by lspicknall / 05/12/2012 at 2:41am / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after my boyfriend broke up with me, the only thing positive about my day was a pregnancy test. FML

by rawr_fml001 / 05/11/2012 at 7:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love