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SeXyPoLaRbEaR

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SeXyPoLaRbEaR

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  • Number of visits : 1077
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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SeXyPoLaRbEaR's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

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SeXyPoLaRbEaR's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18536) - you deserved it (6639)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

#20442364
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25409) - you deserved it (6568)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I bought an eye mask to help me sleep during the day, as I work night shifts. Upon waking up after my first time using it, I forgot I was wearing it and thought I had gone blind, causing me to fall out of the bed and split my head open on my bedside table. FML

#20442267
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20281) - you deserved it (11089)

On 01/04/2013 at 5:13am - health - by idiot - Sweden

Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML

#20442068
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19535) - you deserved it (7143)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

#20442057
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21592) - you deserved it (2187)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:12am - love - by Tiffosaur - United States

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25561) - you deserved it (5180)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to download a parental block so my dad would stop watching porn on my laptop. FML

#20441386
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26540) - you deserved it (1883)

On 01/03/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Tooyoungforthis (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, someone sent my boss a CD full of documents for an upcoming trial. It's my job to sort through the evidence, so he gave it to me. I looked on the CD. There's only one file; a 1020-page PDF of all the documents we need, and the pages weren't scanned in order. FML

#20441300
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28547) - you deserved it (2073)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:36pm - work - by fucked five ways to friday (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom asked me why MS Word keeps underlining some words. After I tried to convince her that you're supposed to put a space after commas, she started yelling at me for making her look stupid. I can never win. FML

#20441192
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23573) - you deserved it (1811)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:36pm - misc - by millavitsa - Ukraine

Today, I went to take a shower. Afterwards, I noticed I'd forgotten to bring a shirt to change into, so I put on a towel and went back to my room, only to witness my 14-year-old brother and a friend smelling my bra, commenting on "how warm it is". FML

Today, I paused the movie my girlfriend and I were watching and told her, for the first time, that I loved her. Her response was to stare at me silently for a few seconds before unpausing the film. FML

#20440422
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34888) - you deserved it (6375)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML

#20440419
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32968) - you deserved it (2970)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:35am - misc - by Dimples (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11147) - you deserved it (39876)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to dinner with my girlfriend of 2 months. This would have been great, had I not been nodding absentmindedly when she suggested that we start planning our wedding soon, because "she's always dreamt of being married on the same day as Brad and Angelina." FML

#20440111
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20197) - you deserved it (21419)

On 01/03/2013 at 1:47am - love - by Brad (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me by writing on my bathroom mirror in Sharpie. What did he write? "Hi, I'm Emily. I'm fat, ugly, and now single." FML

#20440103
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49602) - you deserved it (4389)

On 01/03/2013 at 1:42am - love - by Emily (woman) - United States (Texas)



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