Sammiches

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Sammiches

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 March 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4238
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Sammiches : Hi, my name's Sammiches, I like to draw, watch movies and play videogames.
Valve games are my favourite. (Team Fortress 2, Portal, Half Life)
I mostly listen to electro music (Gemini, Caravan Palace)
Feel free to message me about anything.

Sammiches's page activity

Visits<b>_Adog2645</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 2:54pm<b>jokerphreak</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 3:34am<b>booman342</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:12am<b>WJM505</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 9:48pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 3:59pm<b>goatshark</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 12:31pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:55pm<b>nana_star</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:09pm<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:22am<b>martialartist18</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 2:24pm<b>SuperDani</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 10:39am<b>lovinlife028</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 6:36pm<b>Tezoma</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 4:03am<b>Miss_Red</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 2:13am<b>Killer67a</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 9:31pm<b>lordofpantry</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 8:00pm<b>Thatrand0mguy</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:51am<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:04am

Sammiches's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Sammiches's badges

Sammiches's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

by maniac11 / 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, after a root canal, I went to the pharmacy for some pain killers. The cute girl behind the counter asked what I needed. When I opened my mouth to tell her, a wave of drool hurtled out and splattered on the counter. FML

by maninpain / 10/10/2011 at 3:44pm / Kenya / Love

Today, my sister asked me to explain where to put a tampon. I realized near the end of the conversation that she believed the urine, feces, and blood all came from the same orifice. This began a long discussion during which I was forced to tell her not to put the tampon in her rectum. FML

by ohgawd / 10/08/2011 at 2:48am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was walking down the street on my way to work, when an old lady's walking stick caught my leg and sent me crashing to the ground. She apologised for the accident and watched me stumble to my feet. I said not to worry. Just as I turned to leave, I could swear a smirk crept over her face. FML

by Lucas79 / 10/07/2011 at 9:23pm / Australia / Work

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

by Ramis182 / 10/03/2011 at 12:26am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I came home crying after my boyfriend dumped me for another girl. My dad told me to come tell him what was wrong. I sat down and let it all out, after which he looked up from his book, into my eyes, and gave me his loving advice: "Just cry about it and move on to another bastard." FML

by bastard magnet / 10/02/2011 at 6:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went on a date at a restaurant with a guy. When he promised I wouldn't have to pay the bill, I didn't think he meant we'd be dining and dashing. FML

by scared / 10/02/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

by TraumatizedMother / 10/02/2011 at 3:27am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

by katt_is_here / 10/02/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Colorado) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head against the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2011 at 7:44am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a car accident. In the same place, at the same time, and with the same friend in the passenger seat as last week. FML

by Steve / 09/30/2011 at 6:18am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Transportation

Today, I have come to the point in my life where I need to Google how to stop excessive back sweat. FML

by MissPerspirent / 09/27/2011 at 10:18pm / Canada / Health

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while waiting in line at Gamestop, another customer and the cashier started chatting about how Pokémon is for kids, and anyone over 10 who's into it is weird. Embarrassed, I put the new Pokémon game back on the shelf and snuck out of the store. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 3:18pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 6:26am / Singapore / Love