Sammiches

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Sammiches

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 March 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3731
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Sammiches : Hi, my name's Sammiches, I like to draw, watch movies and play videogames.
Valve games are my favourite. (Team Fortress 2, Portal, Half Life)
I mostly listen to electro music (Gemini, Caravan Palace)
Feel free to message me about anything.

Sammiches's page activity

Visits<b>jokerphreak</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 3:34am<b>booman342</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:12am<b>WJM505</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 9:48pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 3:59pm<b>goatshark</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 12:31pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:55pm<b>nana_star</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:09pm<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:22am<b>martialartist18</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 2:24pm<b>SuperDani</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 10:39am<b>lovinlife028</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 6:36pm<b>Tezoma</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 4:03am<b>Miss_Red</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 2:13am<b>Killer67a</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 9:31pm<b>lordofpantry</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 8:00pm<b>Thatrand0mguy</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:51am<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 10:04am<b>silon5</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:58pm

Sammiches's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of Sammiches's badges

Sammiches's favorite FMLs

Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML

by joser6969 / 10/29/2011 at 10:07am / United States / Work

Today, I got a boner at the dentist. FML

by Me / 10/27/2011 at 2:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, at my job as a produce clerk at a grocery store, I had an entire conversation with my coworker about how nice the new cabbage boxes are. This is all it takes to thrill me these days. FML

by insanitycalling / 10/26/2011 at 2:36am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, it was my first day on duty as a rookie cop. Everything was going great, and even the veterans on the force were warming up to me. That is until my mother came into the station carrying a brown bag for my lunch. Written on the bag was, "Lunch for my big boy. I love you, pumpkin." FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2011 at 2:46pm / United States / Work

Today, my husband and I were getting intimate when a notification for a game popped up on his iPad. He immediately shoved me aside so he could take care of his baby dragon. FML

by mrs.nerd / 10/23/2011 at 8:38am / United States / Love

Today, I was sitting in my room while my mom was talking to my uncle. I had my door open. She said "Yeah my son doesn't know I have his phone password. Girls nowadays are real sluts." FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2011 at 1:30am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the hard way that everyone in my dorm knows I watch My Little Pony. FML

by Brony / 10/22/2011 at 4:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

by titoutou222 / 10/22/2011 at 8:40am / France / Kids

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

by prostitutes boyfriend / 10/21/2011 at 10:55am / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Intimacy

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

by skinny dipper / 10/20/2011 at 10:48pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I have an ear infection, and everything I hear echoes inside my head. I'm an orchestra teacher, and we have our first concert next week. FML

by dolceconfuoco / 10/20/2011 at 12:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

by imy / 10/18/2011 at 11:01am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant with my boyfriend and his family. After the meal, we all decided to open our fortune cookies and read them out loud. On mine, it said "You will change your mind many times before settling down." I didn't realize what it meant until after I'd read it to them. FML

by pupitre / 10/17/2011 at 8:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love