About Saltime : I fell from the sky. I was sent here with one purpose: to create classical and comical comments on FML.
"They hated me. But their hate only fueled my passion."
Now, if you make a stupid comment, you better be ready to back it up.
If you comment with one of the following, I'm going to ruin you. :
"First!"
"That's a shitty situation." (Or any "shitty" pun).
"Haha!" / "LOL."
"YDI for [stupid unrelated reason]."
"[Women in kitchen joke]."
"[Comment that is impossible to read]".
"You spelled [word] wrong!!"
You best be watching your back.
Some experienced users on FML:
•DocBastard
•Sirin
•every1luvsboners
•Perdix
•Didi
Don't screw with them. They'll literally tear you apart. (In addition to a possible Coca-Cola bottle up your arse.)
Enjoy FML!
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was in a restroom sitting on the toilet, when the guy right next to me noticed my AC/DC boxers around my ankles and started to sing "Back in Black." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20001) - you deserved it (1310)
On 07/29/2011 at 10:27am - misc - by sofargone420 (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30018) - you deserved it (7149)
On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, after returning home from a camping trip, I found a leech on my love spuds. I ended up having to call my dad in to help me get it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24242) - you deserved it (3218)
On 07/22/2011 at 8:57pm - intimacy - by jab43 - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41220) - you deserved it (6104)
On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32613) - you deserved it (4782)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32613) - you deserved it (4782)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after 14 rice-filled days in China, I came back home. What's for lunch? Rice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21549) - you deserved it (6904)
On 07/15/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by panos016 - United Kingdom
Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34350) - you deserved it (4782)
On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34350) - you deserved it (4782)
On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)
Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it with water, it now only tastes like water. She has a habit of drinking on Fridays. Today is Friday. My life is a ticking time bomb. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7547) - you deserved it (59548)
On 07/08/2011 at 4:38pm - misc - by UhOh (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7042) - you deserved it (64621)
On 07/06/2011 at 2:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28014) - you deserved it (2712)
On 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username - United States
Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22763) - you deserved it (2839)
On 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm - intimacy - by danam - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11184) - you deserved it (31996)
On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11184) - you deserved it (31996)
On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
