Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Raelthelamb

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

Raelthelamb

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13080
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Raelthelamb : I've read and voted on every single FML on this site. I really need to get a life...

Raelthelamb's page activity

Visits<b>TKCat</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 5:39am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:09pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 1:13am<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 3:07pm<b>cdawg69</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 12:56am<b>sam882</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 4:19pm<b>_DeathsMelody_</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 4:27am<b>poor_gurll1198</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 5:59pm<b>SmittyJA24</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 3:28pm<b>olpally</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 12:55am<b>PhotoSmith</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 1:37pm<b>Rodville</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 11:10am<b>beatlegirl27</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 8:55pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 10:09pm<b>sissy478</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:32pm<b>ChawanKiti</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:06am<b>mintcon</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:14pm<b>thecouchisalive</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:50am

Liked!<b>beatlegirl27</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:55am

Raelthelamb's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Raelthelamb's badges

Raelthelamb's favorite FMLs

Today, I was diagnosed with severe nut allergies. My dad decided to buy jars of Nutella, write "You know you want this" on them, and stick them around the house. FML

#20833620
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47437) - you deserved it (3213)

On 08/12/2013 at 11:24am - health - by nutfreak (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

#20832005
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43743) - you deserved it (4196)

On 08/11/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by ew - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML

#20830944
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50942) - you deserved it (3405)

On 08/10/2013 at 4:56pm - kids - by rachel (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42171) - you deserved it (4898)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, I copied some files to my phone while borrowing my grandfather's laptop. As I selectively deleted the files from the recycle bin, I noticed some pictures, and ended up seeing way more than I wanted to of his erect penis. FML

#20829072
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43093) - you deserved it (9038)

On 08/09/2013 at 1:23pm - intimacy - by whyyjustwhy - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

#20826835
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48953) - you deserved it (4337)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to put my little sister to bed. Usually my mom sings her a lullaby before she puts her to sleep, so I did too. After I finished the song, my sister looked me dead in the eyes and said, "This is why I tell people we aren't related." FML

#20826525
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45634) - you deserved it (5057)

On 08/08/2013 at 12:09am - kids - by NextAmericanIdol? - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48052) - you deserved it (23117)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my surgeon if I would be having a general or local anesthetic at my upcoming operation. He replied, "General, of course! It's gonna be a slaughterhouse in there!" FML

#20824490
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41628) - you deserved it (3669) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/06/2013 at 5:59pm - health - by pong - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, my mom's dog saw a cat in our yard. I watched as he tried to jump at it, only to smack face-first into the window. He did this twice more before curling up on the floor and whimpering pitifully. When my mom came in and saw him there, and me laughing, she accused me of beating him. FML

#20822442
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44698) - you deserved it (6695)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:36pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Dalarnas Lan)

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

#20820474
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47273) - you deserved it (2862)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm - work - by Neanderthals walk among us (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, my fiancé told me he wished he never met me and that he wished I didn't exist. Our wedding is next week. FML

#20819957
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50865) - you deserved it (4976)

On 08/04/2013 at 4:37am - love - by uniannonymous - United Kingdom (Merton)

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

#20818422
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60919) - you deserved it (5977)

On 08/03/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by zackeryburch - United States (California)

Today, I found a topless photo of my mother on my phone. Thanks, iCloud. FML

#20818189
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47888) - you deserved it (4584)

On 08/03/2013 at 2:46am - misc - by fsdjhgasjlhg (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53594) - you deserved it (8517)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: