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Raelthelamb

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Raelthelamb

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11528
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Raelthelamb : I've read and voted on every single FML on this site. I really need to get a life...

Raelthelamb's page activity

Visits<b>Rodville</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 11:10am<b>beatlegirl27</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 8:55pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 10:09pm<b>sissy478</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:32pm<b>ChawanKiti</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:06am<b>mintcon</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:14pm<b>thecouchisalive</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:50am<b>TheEnforcer</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 5:03pm<b>memily63</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:22pm<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:25pm<b>yesIAmAnAsshole</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 4:12pm<b>julesvasquez</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 6:32pm<b>candiicane</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 12:01pm<b>fancypotato</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 4:33pm<b>badminton</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 4:29pm<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:52pm<b>Rajni_dev</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 11:23am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 5:11pm

Liked!<b>beatlegirl27</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:55am

Raelthelamb's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Raelthelamb's badges

Raelthelamb's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

#6433881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38827) - you deserved it (2954)

On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I had to put my 17 year old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML

#6415288
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31726) - you deserved it (3392)

On 11/22/2009 at 11:30pm - love - by petlover (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa masturbating, with a message that said he wished me a white Christmas. FML

#6401581
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21276) - you deserved it (3799)

On 11/22/2009 at 4:15am - intimacy - by lonewolf2701 - United States

Today, I was at a zoo with some friends in Germany. People were talking to this bird and it responded in complete, grammatically correct German sentences. One of my friends said 'Wow, that bird has better grammar than the exchange student!' A bird speaks better German than me. FML

#6389403
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24924) - you deserved it (4497)

On 11/21/2009 at 7:19am - animals - by bird-brain (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my jeep wouldn't start so I opened the hood. I slammed my fingers in my jeep's hood. It latched shut. My hood release was inside the cab, and the jeep was in neutral and on an incline. It started to roll... with a ditch about 5 yards away. I had to skin my own fingers to get them out. FML

#6383914
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42004) - you deserved it (7605)

On 11/20/2009 at 8:28pm - misc - by FoundMyLighter (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, a old lady on the street told me that I should be wearing a bra because my nipples were visible under my white tee. I am a 37 year old man. FML

#6373189
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22078) - you deserved it (5193)

On 11/19/2009 at 7:41pm - health - by Mondo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my new Blackberry Curve sitting on my lunch tray. Unthinkingly, i tossed it into the garbage can. 10 minutes later i realized I had thrown it away and spent the next hour searching through six garbage cans of half-eaten food. FML

#6372164
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6323) - you deserved it (24851)

On 11/19/2009 at 6:37pm - misc - by gravycoveredblackberry (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, as I left class I felt a tug on my rucksack from behind. Thinking it was just someone deliberately dragging me back, I struggled to let myself free and shouted "Let go!". I looked over my shoulder just to find that one the straps was trapped in the doorhandle. Everyone was in hysterics. FML

#6369387
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9715) - you deserved it (24265)

On 11/19/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by betamaxjim (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I was baking cookies and opened the oven door to check on them. Apparently, wearing a gold necklace means the wave of heat will burn your very fair skin. I now have a bright red ring of stars around my neck. FML

#6367653
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21375) - you deserved it (5954)

On 11/19/2009 at 11:41am - misc - by Sam_Licker81 (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was running a meeting feeling very stressed. I grabbed my stress ball out of my bag, squeezing it vigorously throughout the meeting. When I stood up to talk my stress ball exploded all over my new black suit and the desk. So much for relieving stress. FML

#6337825
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24146) - you deserved it (3755)

On 11/17/2009 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after months of trying to potty train my son, he finally told me he used the potty. I went to the bathroom to check. There was nothing there. So I asked him "Where did you go to the potty?". He then grabbed my hand and took me to the cat's litter box. My son has successfully litter trained himself. FML

#6321583
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31321) - you deserved it (3640)

On 11/16/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Japan (Okinawa)

Today, I was at work, when this guy came in and paid for his ice cream, then handed me a dollar. I've never gotten a tip before, so I looked at him and said, "Thank you so much, I appreciate it." He stared at me with a weird look for a moment, and then said, "Can I just get that in quarters?" FML

#6313806
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26305) - you deserved it (4965)

On 11/15/2009 at 3:04pm - money - by notip (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I noticed that in my cover letter I wrote "I also have an eye.", instead of "I also have an eye for details.", and I have been sending it out for the past few weeks. No wonder I haven't gotten any replies. FML

#6299927
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8257) - you deserved it (26892)

On 11/14/2009 at 11:52am - work - by crazylobster (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was a TA watching the class take a test. I didn't realize that the projector was still on while I was searching the Internet. They watched me google "chronic itchy anus". FML

#6287129
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10362) - you deserved it (48013)

On 11/13/2009 at 12:47pm - health - by yellowjacket_34 (man) - United States (Montana)



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