Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Raelthelamb

Offline (5 hours ago) | Search for a member

Raelthelamb

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 October 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18863
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Raelthelamb : I've read and voted on every single FML on this site. I really need to get a life...

Raelthelamb's page activity

Visits<b>daisysadie</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:17pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:03pm<b>sam882</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 6:32pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:58am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:47am<b>Steffi3</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 6:19am<b>Crazyjohnb</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 2:27am<b>Ajf92002</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 12:57am<b>mergeterge</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 2:19am<b>cyborghinge</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 5:20pm<b>owencgray</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 5:33pm<b>TKCat</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 5:39am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:09pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 1:13am<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 3:07pm<b>cdawg69</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 12:56am<b>_DeathsMelody_</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 4:27am<b>poor_gurll1198</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 5:59pm

Fucked!<b>beatlegirl27</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:55am

Raelthelamb's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Raelthelamb's badges

Raelthelamb's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML

#20993041
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25883) - you deserved it (32427)

On 12/15/2013 at 1:47am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52980) - you deserved it (8367)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one for all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho and almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML

Today, a woman called the store I work for. When she found out it was a wrong number, she started to cry and asked me to stay on the line with her, talking about her dead husband and how she hasn't laughed in years. FML

Today, my grandma commented on my Facebook profile picture: "That's a great photo! It doesn't look anything like you!" FML

#20982946
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36184) - you deserved it (3310)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by oh (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML

#20982904
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51408) - you deserved it (8435)

On 12/06/2013 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by fuckadaisical (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, my friend's dog got hit by a car. I was the only one not in shock, and had to drag the poor thing off the road, then comfort a hysterical friend while the driver verbally abused us and demanded we pay for the repairs to his car. FML

Today, my wicked mother has been with us for a week. She's already thrown away my daughter's favorite toy, broke my computer, scratched my oak table, stained my most expensive shirt, peed in our bed, and called the attention of the cops by staring at kids in school. She's staying for three months. FML

Today, I lost my phone. I called the number from my friend's phone, hoping I could find it. A guy answered, laughed "Thanks for the phone!" and hung up. FML

#20979337
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47004) - you deserved it (3772)

On 12/03/2013 at 12:54pm - misc - by phonegotlostinthepark - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML

#20978310
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36782) - you deserved it (25807)

On 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by Sherressa (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my mother posted a video of me giving birth, on Facebook. FML

#20974447
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56660) - you deserved it (4163)

On 11/29/2013 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, with my name sounding vaguely like 'Turkey' and being in the phonebook for business purposes, people keep calling, offering to stuff me for Thanksgiving. FML

#20973255
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36718) - you deserved it (3231)

On 11/28/2013 at 1:26am - animals - by NotTellingYouMyName (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31203) - you deserved it (14793)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while chatting to my mother, I tried to show her a funny website by pasting the URL into a message. After I sent the message, I realised that my browser hadn't copied the URL I wanted to send her, and that I'd actually pasted the previous URL I copied. It was porn. FML

#20957289
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21203) - you deserved it (42847)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:57am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was telling my friends a story. I added a few "embellishments" to make it more intense. One my friends piped up with, "I was with you, half of what you just said wasn't true". It's now all over Facebook and I'm known as "The Bullshitter". FML

#20944930
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16818) - you deserved it (67097)

On 11/04/2013 at 6:39am - misc - by Anonymous -



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: