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Raelthelamb

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Raelthelamb

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8774
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Raelthelamb : My life sucks, and that's why I'm here.

Raelthelamb's page activity

Visits<b>sissy478</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:32pm<b>ChawanKiti</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:06am<b>mintcon</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:14pm<b>thecouchisalive</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:50am<b>TheEnforcer</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 5:03pm<b>memily63</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:22pm<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:25pm<b>yesIAmAnAsshole</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 4:12pm<b>julesvasquez</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 6:32pm<b>candiicane</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 12:01pm<b>fancypotato</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 4:33pm<b>badminton</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 4:29pm<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:52pm<b>Rajni_dev</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 11:23am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 5:11pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:14pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 8:24am<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 2:39am

Raelthelamb's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Raelthelamb's favorite FMLs

Today, my English teacher kicked me out of class for being "rude and disruptive." In actuality, I had called her out for having blatantly used Google Translate for several example sentences, all of which sounded as if a semi-literate foreigner had constructed them. FML

#19755806
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20399) - you deserved it (3417)

On 06/08/2012 at 3:45pm - misc - by hackshack (man) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)

Today, in a drunken state, I decided that it would be a good idea to shave with a pizza cutter. FML

#19748828
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5882) - you deserved it (30738)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:10am - health - by Darwin_Award_Winner (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had my first ever shift at the zoo. My job is to explain the characteristics and habits of various animals to the visitors. A five-year-old outsmarted me while I was talking about lions. FML

#19744137
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9142) - you deserved it (21903)

On 06/06/2012 at 1:04pm - animals - by DuhSteven - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

#19743887
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13832) - you deserved it (37089)

On 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Rob (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

#19710621
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18696) - you deserved it (38897)

On 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to see a once-in-a-lifetime moment when the Olympic torch passed through my town. I waited for 3 hours only to get a bruise from a man shoving me out of the way at the exact moment it went past. FML

#19667339
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22152) - you deserved it (2086)

On 05/23/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Notorch (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, there is an annular solar eclipse. As I was buying the last pair of solar glasses to watch the eclipse with, some jerk snatched them out of my hands and bolted off with them. I now have to make the decision between watching the eclipse and not going blind. FML

#19653342
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17837) - you deserved it (2776)

On 05/20/2012 at 7:35pm - misc - by VocalizedBoar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

#19646260
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37786) - you deserved it (5040)

On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

#19646260
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37786) - you deserved it (5040)

On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11186) - you deserved it (58552)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML

#19606582
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22120) - you deserved it (2962)

On 05/11/2012 at 9:24am - misc - by MobPerfect (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML

#19595886
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24747) - you deserved it (2122)

On 05/09/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by aligator1009 - United States

Today, I was practicing for a choir concert that I have next week. My mom walked into my room and listened to me for a little while. After I finished the last song, she smiled, patted me on the head and said, "It's okay honey, I can't sing either." FML

#19590549
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19852) - you deserved it (2493)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by Ellie (woman) - United States

Today, I went with my boyfriend to the optometrist for him to buy contact lenses for the first time. He said the detail was much better than glasses. I excitedly asked him if he could see my freckles better now, and after a long and disappointed look at my face, he said "Nope, just more acne." FML

#19580069
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20477) - you deserved it (3187)

On 05/06/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I wrecked my car and got rushed to the emergency room. While strapped to a gurney, a nurse reached in my back pocket, grabbed my wallet and pulled the velcro keeping my wallet shut. The entire room immediately started laughing as condoms and loose change went flying everywhere. FML

#19572615
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18348) - you deserved it (3639)

On 05/04/2012 at 10:34am - misc - by UnderConstruction (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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