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Raelthelamb

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Raelthelamb
  • Town/Country : At your window, watching you sleep
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4700
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Raelthelamb : Graham the ham. That's what I am.
Graham's the name. Making bad rhymes is my game.

what am I doing with my life

Raelthelamb's last visitors

NWO666thebestintheworlAmanyyyyyyphatdaddy62Secret_NinjaaYellowKettleBellchickaslimshadyjack_jill05jake_mcc15

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Raelthelamb's favorite FMLs

Today, I went with my boyfriend to the optometrist for him to buy contact lenses for the first time. He said the detail was much better than glasses. I excitedly asked him if he could see my freckles better now, and after a long and disappointed look at my face, he said "Nope, just more acne." FML

#19580069
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17270) - you deserved it (2824)

On 05/06/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I wrecked my car and got rushed to the emergency room. While strapped to a gurney, a nurse reached in my back pocket, grabbed my wallet and pulled the velcro keeping my wallet shut. The entire room immediately started laughing as condoms and loose change went flying everywhere. FML

#19572615
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13835) - you deserved it (2607)

On 05/04/2012 at 10:34am - misc - by UnderConstruction (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was confirmed that the "no pet rule" in my apartment complex is so strict that I'm not even allowed to have sea monkeys. FML

#19561558
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (2320)

On 05/01/2012 at 11:59pm - animals - by Monkeyless (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was in a gas station bathroom attempting to buy a condom from the machine on the wall. A woman who smelled of cat piss walked in, and I got embarrassed so I fled into a stall. She then started a conversation with me about "the good old days" from the next stall over. FML

#19559946
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15092) - you deserved it (2927)

On 05/01/2012 at 7:43pm - misc - by Megannn (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the supermarket when I saw an elderly lady slip on a wet patch of floor. I ran over to help, and I almost fell too before steadying myself. Then some pimply cockmunch of a teen decided to kick my legs out from under me and walk away while laughing his balls off. FML

#19558069
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23262) - you deserved it (1848)

On 05/01/2012 at 12:17pm - health - by karmafails (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my parents decided on my punishment for failing an English test. No deodorant for a week. They think they're so hilarious, they told all their friends and now it's all over Facebook. FML

#19555770
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22090) - you deserved it (3343)

On 04/30/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by sockmonkey (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

#19547170
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31407) - you deserved it (8087)

On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States

Today, I found out I have a kidney infection. Now I'm forced to drink at least 4 glasses of water before going to bed. I also have to be woken up every two hours to be told to, "GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!" by my mother. FML

#19520981
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22007) - you deserved it (1724)

On 04/24/2012 at 7:50am - health - by hottygirl905 - United States (Florida)

Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

#19520767
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7257) - you deserved it (58185)

On 04/24/2012 at 4:29am - work - by xharmonyx - United States

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

#19517989
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23847) - you deserved it (3957)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:51pm - kids - by sadmommy - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
426 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38693) - you deserved it (3514)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

#19505040
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20418) - you deserved it (4030)

On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML

#19489197
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18511) - you deserved it (4238)

On 04/18/2012 at 9:43am - misc - by Fartfail (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14682) - you deserved it (25575)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML

#19460120
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22292) - you deserved it (3553)

On 04/13/2012 at 5:43am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada



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