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Raelthelamb

Offline (the 07/20/2014 at 9:01pm) | Search for a member

Raelthelamb

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7652
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Raelthelamb : My life sucks, and that's why I'm here.

Raelthelamb's page activity

Visits<b>ChawanKiti</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:06am<b>mintcon</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:14pm<b>thecouchisalive</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:50am<b>TheEnforcer</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 5:03pm<b>memily63</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:22pm<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:25pm<b>yesIAmAnAsshole</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 4:12pm<b>julesvasquez</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 6:32pm<b>candiicane</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 12:01pm<b>fancypotato</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 4:33pm<b>badminton</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 4:29pm<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:52pm<b>Rajni_dev</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 11:23am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 5:11pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:14pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 8:24am<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 2:39am<b>abbbeyS</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 8:38pm

Raelthelamb's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Raelthelamb's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML

#20778274
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47031) - you deserved it (6874)

On 07/12/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by So little trust. (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

#20777956
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45124) - you deserved it (5896)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML

#20775381
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52993) - you deserved it (3143)

On 07/11/2013 at 12:52am - health - by frustrated - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML

#20774208
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51667) - you deserved it (7629)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75817) - you deserved it (3691)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my older brother told me that the only reason I like cats is because they control minds. I laughed. He was serious. FML

#20771105
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34220) - you deserved it (3259)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:26pm - animals - by Zoey_M - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

#20770214
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43561) - you deserved it (4149)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

#20763590
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57716) - you deserved it (4547)

On 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I had a job interview. All was going well until the interviewer asked me, "So, why should we hire you?" Without thinking, I blurted out, "Because, I'm awesome!" Don't think I'll be getting that one. FML

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

#20755309
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40281) - you deserved it (4516)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:36am - health - by TooYoungForThis - Canada

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48758) - you deserved it (3125)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, I overheard my dad telling my mum that the only way I'm ever going to get into a relationship is if I "pose as a woman and con some gullible bastard online." He's probably right. FML

#20754680
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40675) - you deserved it (4524)

On 06/29/2013 at 5:49pm - love - by cheerbabeXoXo (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

#20753916
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47558) - you deserved it (2549)

On 06/29/2013 at 5:55am - misc - by Angry and Confused - United States (Nevada)

Today, the weather was so hot that I couldn't stop sweating profusely while using the restroom. Ever slipped off the toilet seat and hit the floor hard due to ass-sweat? Not a pleasant experience. FML

#20750694
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47378) - you deserved it (5879)

On 06/27/2013 at 4:27pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

#20749220
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25194) - you deserved it (31841)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by blahblah (woman) - United States (Texas)



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