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RaV3N911's favorite FMLs
by PeeFlavouredFloss / 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by Mary / 01/13/2013 at 10:49am / Czech Republic / Miscellaneous
Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML
by Drewbie / 01/13/2013 at 3:53am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
by hiccups / 01/13/2013 at 1:15am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids
Today, I opened the door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML
by fucking mafia or what?? / 01/12/2013 at 5:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm / Norway (Rogaland) / Love
by deadhammy / 01/11/2013 at 2:09am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML
by Amy / 01/10/2013 at 12:09am / United States / Intimacy
by loveyouson / 01/09/2013 at 1:48pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/06/2013 at 8:06am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Birthday girl / 01/06/2013 at 12:59am / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous
Today, both my car and my father's car were broken into. They stole my radio, purse, wallet, camera, and multiple items of clothing. What did they take from my dad's car? Some screwdrivers to rip my radio out of my dash. FML
by Anonymous / 01/05/2013 at 12:54am / United States / Transportation
Today, when I got home I noticed a statue of a gnome sitting next to the door. I've had an intense phobia of gnomes since I was a child, and I can't bring myself to walk past it. It's been half an hour and I'm still standing outside. I can see my dad through the window laughing and waving. FML
by VampObsessed / 01/05/2013 at 12:30am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Tooyoungforthis / 01/03/2013 at 7:34pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…
- Today, after not having sex for nearly a year and a half, an opportunity arose. I couldn't get it… Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden… Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to…