RaV3N911

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Offline (the 05/07/2015 at 7:31pm)

RaV3N911

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 May 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2596
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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RaV3N911's page activity

Visits<b>luc887</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 1:07pm<b>vballgirly28</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 5:39pm<b>mickaela_</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 10:16am<b>xALEXx</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 12:25am<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 1:45am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 1:59am<b>rainie713</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 10:12am<b>larson15</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 2:16am<b>jaffvis</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 7:45pm<b>DejonE</b> - the 05/21/2013 at 11:43pm<b>OhhhMaryy</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 2:09am<b>pokeyprice</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 2:13am<b>maz95</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 7:09am<b>Mariella1996</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 2:17pm<b>jrec</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 9:36am<b>efelsh</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 11:07pm<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 7:44pm<b>nicolemadden</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 7:26pm

RaV3N911's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of RaV3N911's badges

RaV3N911's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, my boyfriend started watching The Big Bang Theory on DVD. Now he won't stop saying "Bazinga" every time he says or hears something that sounds funny. It's so annoying I want to feed him to the neighbor's dog. FML

by FUSheldon / 11/28/2012 at 12:15am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was separating my notes into two piles: one to save for exam studying and one to throw out. I finished separating, picked up the junk pile and absentmindedly shredded it. Afterwards, I looked down to see the junk pile still completely intact. Goodbye, passing grades. FML

by shark / 11/26/2012 at 10:03pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML

by imnotacheateryouimmaturefuck / 11/26/2012 at 8:41pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2012 at 1:56am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2012 at 9:35pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, I saw my cat playing with one of his many toy mice. Knowing he likes to play fetch, I picked it up and threw it across the room. Upon trying to pick it up a second time, I realized that not only was it not a toy, but it was only half-dead. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2012 at 1:17am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

by WamBamSam / 11/21/2012 at 4:54am / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2012 at 8:15pm / United States / Love

Today, I was sitting on a train, doing homework for my programming class, when a man sat in the seat next to me. He must have been a programmer too, because he spent the next few hours staring at my screen and laughing whenever I made a mistake. FML

by Trinity / 11/19/2012 at 5:37pm / Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML

by he's mine / 11/14/2012 at 2:46am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love

Today, I discovered both how much I really talk to myself when I'm drinking alone and how thin the walls of my apartment are. I heard my own slurred voice coming from my neighbor's apartment. They had recorded me and made a mixtape of some of the more interesting things I had said. FML

by talker / 11/14/2012 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML

by Mmkay1515 / 11/12/2012 at 10:47pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

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