About R3TROxLOV3 : What to say... :O
*I’m 18
*I’m a girl
*I devour books. Not literally Devour them, but devour them as in I read an average of 8 per a week
*I'm usually quite friendly, but if someone rubs me the wrong way, I can turn into a bitch from hell.
*I play 3 instruments (piano-1o years, viola- 8years, guitar- 2 years) and sing
*I laugh, A Lot
*Most people either like me, or hate me. Frankly, I don't care either way, because I'm not here to make you happy.
*I lack a filter, meaning i say things without fully processing what I'm about to say, and whether or not It's an appropriate thing to say in public. I will undoubtedly offend someone almost every time I comment, but usually not on purpose.
*I don't like it when guys on FML send me messages with pick-up lines. Seriously. I get them frequently and it's quite irritating. So stop it. I don't find it endearing, it just makes me homicidal.
… The End :)
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
Today, my twit of a husband admitted to falling for an internet scam involving a dead foreign politician, the promise of a share in millions of dollars currently stuck in a bank, and him having wired a large amount of our money to "bribe an official". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24838) - you deserved it (3255)
On 08/04/2011 at 5:15am - money - by Username - United States
Today, I found out why my cups of tea have been tasting a bit funny. It turns out my kettle is full of ants, so every time I boil water to make tea, the ants get re-boiled along with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24981) - you deserved it (11129)
On 08/01/2011 at 4:32am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31049) - you deserved it (8235)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my mom decided to do something new and borrowed some of my clothes. She's currently wearing a very small pair of short shorts and a very tight tank top. We're going to a very prestigious golf course and she won't change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23507) - you deserved it (3298)
On 06/24/2011 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that’s what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42982) - you deserved it (2502) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38151) - you deserved it (3578)
On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38151) - you deserved it (3578)
On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38151) - you deserved it (3578)
On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38151) - you deserved it (3578)
On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my ex husband is marrying my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (82321) - you deserved it (4703)
On 05/21/2011 at 11:31am - love - by uetlqdja - United States (Texas)
Today, while working at a restaurant, an elderly lady stuck my tip in my back pocket as I was walking away. I wish I knew this before I'd thrown her to the floor for touching my hiney. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10303) - you deserved it (28223)
On 05/20/2011 at 3:38pm - work - by rioght onnn - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (90782) - you deserved it (9942)
On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24487) - you deserved it (6282)
On 05/09/2011 at 10:34pm - kids - by richkief76 -
Today, at work my boss told me I have been late, under-productive, and using up a lot of sick days. He says my job is on the line. My reason for barely showing up at work: I've been on maternity leave for 6 weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26947) - you deserved it (2469)
On 04/25/2011 at 7:41am - work - by Aginsafa (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I came out to my parents. They nodded empathetically throughout my entire speech and told me repeatedly that it was okay. As I smiled and stood up, my dad asked, "But you're still going to marry a guy, right?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32404) - you deserved it (6799)
On 04/13/2011 at 6:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
