Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

R3TROxLOV3

Offline (the 02/11/2016 at 1:18am) | Search for a member

R3TROxLOV3

24Fucked!

R3TROxLOV3R3TROxLOV3
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 30 December 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11574
  • Number of comments : 410
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About R3TROxLOV3 : I basically have an alarming level of disdain directed towards all of you. Because of this disdain, I feel that roughly 99% of you aren't worth talking to. As such, refrain from messaging me, because I won't answer.

R3TROxLOV3's page activity

Visits<b>arealsexybitch</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 7:09pm<b>Alexis2742</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 10:48am<b>PiscesNation</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 7:18pm<b>C0bblepot</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 5:34pm<b>Oihana</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 8:19pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 8:41pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 6:28pm<b>watchwhileusleep</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 5:43pm<b>LanceGoodthrust</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 4:07pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 8:22am<b>gabechriswill</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 1:16am<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 12:37pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 1:42am<b>Robert3242009</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 7:22pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 7:55am<b>sam144</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 12:38am<b>samrompain</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 9:49pm<b>Shayn_25</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 4:21pm

Fucked!<b>tiger820</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 2:22pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 5:06pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 4:14pm<b>Tenker</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 7:04am<b>puckyou</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:02am<b>patte</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 1:38am<b>LanceGoodthrust</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 5:08am<b>coppersmith</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 9:01pm<b>Estrangement</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 5:18am<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 5:17am<b>zjay</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 4:35am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:24pm<b>teazyfisher</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:33pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 4:09am<b>bionicslash</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 5:13pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 1:40am<b>morlogg</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:31pm<b>corporatescoundr</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 12:09am

R3TROxLOV3's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of R3TROxLOV3's badges

R3TROxLOV3's favorite FMLs

Today, I spoke to my ex again for the first time after our breakup. The first words out of his mouth were, "I love you, so I'm going to have to confess some things in the hopes that my honesty will help us get back together." It didn't, but it does mean I have to get tested now. FML

#19546039
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32051) - you deserved it (3090)

On 04/29/2012 at 2:41am - health - by Anne - United States

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

#19527875
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28663) - you deserved it (8389)

On 04/25/2012 at 4:06pm - kids - by KC (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML

#19527572
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28033) - you deserved it (2236)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46pm - misc - by :| (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26998) - you deserved it (2973)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26998) - you deserved it (2973)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML

#19522939
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26332) - you deserved it (18873)

On 04/24/2012 at 5:28pm - misc - by Jaclk - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML

#19517748
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15291) - you deserved it (53373)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm - misc - by pathetic (man) - Poland (Mazowieckie)

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30190) - you deserved it (12068)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past month. The lady he has been seeing is a choreographer that was teaching him how to dance salsa for our wedding rehearsal. FML

#19509327
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33353) - you deserved it (2424)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:20am - love - by Gennifer - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML

#19504672
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28192) - you deserved it (4775)

On 04/21/2012 at 2:15am - misc - by wmkaz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML

#19504619
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9512) - you deserved it (35148)

On 04/21/2012 at 2:01am - animals - by gimmeasalad - United States (California)

Today, while looking through my wedding photos, I realised my wife had done a duck face in every single one. FML

#19496136
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42115) - you deserved it (6266)

On 04/19/2012 at 3:46pm - love - by caaarl (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML

#19483512
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33677) - you deserved it (2580)

On 04/17/2012 at 10:54am - love - by unloved (woman) - United States

Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML

#19477249
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51952) - you deserved it (5653)

On 04/16/2012 at 4:12am - intimacy - by oface13 (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: