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R3TROxLOV3

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R3TROxLOV3

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6357
  • Number of comments : 354
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About R3TROxLOV3 : I don't like stupid people. That's really all you need to know.

Unfortunately I was under the impression that we all understood that FML is NOT a dating service, so I removed a portion of my profile recently. I shortly discovered that not all of us are aware of FML's non-dating site status, so I'm forced to put this back: I am not here to meet the love of my life. I'm not here to look for a f**k buddy. Heck, I'm not even here looking for friends. I am here because I want to read about suckish events that happen to strangers, and occasionally comment on comments posted by other people with the same objective as me. That being said, don't tell I'm pretty, don't ask where I'm from, what my name is, or what my phone number is. In fact, don't ask me for any personal information at all. I do not like being hit on by strange men, and deciding to ignore this incredibly long winded message will only earn you my scorn.

TL;DR: If you hit on me, I will bite you - and not in the kinky way.

R3TROxLOV3's page activity

Visits<b>LanceGoodthrust</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 7:40am<b>mydumblifesucks</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 12:01pm<b>ChristianH39</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 3:18pm<b>Lanker</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 5:46pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:43pm<b>bored359</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 11:14pm<b>pennyprostitute</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 10:49pm<b>SaintGoobers</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 9:16pm<b>melons</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:47pm<b>gregsgirlfriend</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:15pm<b>thefmlstarfruit</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 3:17pm<b>nessalouise</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 2:53pm<b>jizzwold</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 1:33pm<b>candiicane</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 7:29am<b>feeltheluck</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:47pm<b>TPH1979</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 9:48pm<b>aruam365</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:05pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:28pm

Liked!<b>seeoseek</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 12:09am<b>s_t_adam</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:57pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 10:56pm<b>eaglerob</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 4:41am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:24pm

R3TROxLOV3's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of R3TROxLOV3's badges

R3TROxLOV3's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML

#12474079
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43327) - you deserved it (3308)

On 08/12/2010 at 8:02am - intimacy - by ScarredEars - United States

Today, my best friend who I've known since high school is getting married. I'm supposed to give a toast during the reception about how great the bride and groom are. I've been sleeping with the groom for the past 7 months. FML

#12294723
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10429) - you deserved it (128317)

On 08/03/2010 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Emily (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my fiancé invited his pregnant co-worker for dinner. After we finished eating, he sat down and explained to me that her kid is his and that he's been cheating on me with her for 5 months. She had a smile on her face during the entire thing. FML

#12284629
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73469) - you deserved it (4247)

On 08/03/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Broken (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Abu Dhabi)

Today, while I was at work, I heard one of my employees laughing on the phone. I told him to shut up and get back to work. Turns out he was actually crying because his father had just died. FML

#12251529
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9474) - you deserved it (57069)

On 08/01/2010 at 8:34pm - work - by bloodymatzaball - United States

Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML

#12187023
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31234) - you deserved it (3323)

On 07/29/2010 at 1:29pm - misc - by pandaboo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend wearing one of my pads on his hand, because he didn't want to pay to go to the hospital for stitches. FML

#12022109
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27961) - you deserved it (3659)

On 07/21/2010 at 9:52am - health - by blank - United States

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

#10658705
516 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15178) - you deserved it (237688)

On 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by Chichensoup (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41237) - you deserved it (7597)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I started biting my nails, before I realized I'd forgotten to wash my hands after taking a massive dump. FML

#8973652
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4758) - you deserved it (54302)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:53pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

#8889427
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18790) - you deserved it (35587)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my husband bought me a beautiful pair of earrings for my birthday, to match the necklace he'd spent months searching for online the previous year. What necklace? He gave me a watch he found at Walmart last year. I wonder who the lucky girl with the necklace is. FML

#8870594
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27925) - you deserved it (2263)

On 03/06/2010 at 2:42pm - love - by happybirthday (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I gave a technical presentation to a group of male colleagues. I was surprised by how attentive they were until I went to the washroom and realized that they could see every detail of my nipples through my new shirt. FML

#8673018
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20261) - you deserved it (14069)

On 02/26/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by bun593 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex girlfriend that never moved out. FML

#8631765
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28832) - you deserved it (2455)

On 02/25/2010 at 1:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after 25 years of marriage and 2 children, I was served with divorce papers. It turns out my 51 year old, soon to be ex, has been having an affair with the 24 year old tutor I hired to help our daughter bring her grades up. They are in love and want to start a new family together as soon as possible. FML

#8400921
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39529) - you deserved it (2388)

On 02/18/2010 at 4:51am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - United States

Today, after 25 years of marriage and 2 children, I was served with divorce papers. It turns out my 51 year old, soon to be ex, has been having an affair with the 24 year old tutor I hired to help our daughter bring her grades up. They are in love and want to start a new family together as soon as possible. FML

#8400921
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39529) - you deserved it (2388)

On 02/18/2010 at 4:51am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - United States



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