Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

R3TROxLOV3

Online | Search for a member

R3TROxLOV3

9Liked!

R3TROxLOV3
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7822
  • Number of comments : 368
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About R3TROxLOV3 : I don't like stupid people. That's really all you need to know.

Unfortunately I was under the impression that we all understood that FML is NOT a dating service, so I removed a portion of my profile recently. I shortly discovered that not all of us are aware of FML's non-dating site status, so I'm forced to put this back: I am not here to meet the love of my life. I'm not here to look for a f**k buddy. Heck, I'm not even here looking for friends. I am here because I want to read about suckish events that happen to strangers, and occasionally comment on comments posted by other people with the same objective as me. That being said, don't tell I'm pretty, don't ask where I'm from, what my name is, or what my phone number is. In fact, don't ask me for any personal information at all. I do not like being hit on by strange men, and deciding to ignore this incredibly long winded message will only earn you my scorn.

TL;DR: If you hit on me, I will bite you - and not in the kinky way.

R3TROxLOV3's page activity

Visits<b>DoomSkuller</b> - 5 hours ago<b>Karma220</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 9:26pm<b>lilcuz69</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:34pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 3:25pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 1:39pm<b>invizibubble</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 5:03am<b>j_portal</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 2:38pm<b>imyy</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 2:08pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 9:23am<b>LennyLemon</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 11:56pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 11:48am<b>teazyfisher</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 10:26pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 8:33pm<b>michaelf461</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:35pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 3:36pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 3:27pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:12am<b>kaz55</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:05am

Liked!<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 1:40am<b>morlogg</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:31pm<b>corporatescoundr</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 12:09am<b>invizibubble</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 11:11am<b>seeoseek</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 12:09am<b>s_t_adam</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:57pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 10:56pm<b>eaglerob</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 4:41am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:24pm

R3TROxLOV3's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of R3TROxLOV3's badges

R3TROxLOV3's favorite FMLs

Today, I was arguing with a friend over whether or not I'm fat. She kept telling me that I was. Angry, I sat down on the chair beside her. It broke. FML

#17428761
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28124) - you deserved it (21182)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:12pm - misc - by elvisfreak5446 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking to get ice-cream with my boyfriend. When we were ordering our cone, the girl who was scooping it said to my boyfriend, "Hey I know you! You're the one who slept with my sister-in-law the other night." FML

#17417744
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49433) - you deserved it (4621)

On 08/09/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by the2girls - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my twit of a husband admitted to falling for an internet scam involving a dead foreign politician, the promise of a share in millions of dollars currently stuck in a bank, and him having wired a large amount of our money to "bribe an official". FML

#17364485
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30391) - you deserved it (4353)

On 08/04/2011 at 5:15am - money - by Username - United States

Today, my grandmother updated her will. Previously, it denied inheritance to family members with non-white spouses, and any mixed-raced children. Now it does the same with politically correct terminology. She then bragged about how accepting she is in front of my Korean husband and our daughter. FML

#17336031
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31026) - you deserved it (3272)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out why my cups of tea have been tasting a bit funny. It turns out my kettle is full of ants, so every time I boil water to make tea, the ants get re-boiled along with it. FML

#17329330
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31045) - you deserved it (15839)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:32am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

#17190246
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38456) - you deserved it (11032)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom decided to do something new and borrowed some of my clothes. She's currently wearing a very small pair of short shorts and a very tight tank top. We're going to a very prestigious golf course and she won't change. FML

#16833815
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29258) - you deserved it (4451)

On 06/24/2011 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

#16722873
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50181) - you deserved it (3387) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/18/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Inconnu - France

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

#16569461
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44639) - you deserved it (4608)

On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

#16569461
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44639) - you deserved it (4608)

On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

#16569461
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44639) - you deserved it (4608)

On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

#16569461
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44639) - you deserved it (4608)

On 06/08/2011 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I accidentally said, "Yes, Sir." to my female teacher. I then apologized by saying, "Sorry, Sir." FML

#16418676
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33262) - you deserved it (15048)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:14pm - misc - by OopsKid (man) - France

Today, my ex husband is marrying my sister. FML

#16279756
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96272) - you deserved it (6399)

On 05/21/2011 at 11:31am - love - by uetlqdja - United States (Texas)

Today, while working at a restaurant, an elderly lady stuck my tip in my back pocket as I was walking away. I wish I knew this before I'd thrown her to the floor for touching my hiney. FML

#16268137
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13470) - you deserved it (39479)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:38pm - work - by rioght onnn - Canada (Ontario)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: