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Polkadot_492

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Polkadot_492

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 June 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 754
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Polkadot_492 : I love making friends

Polkadot_492's page activity

Visits<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 7:46am<b>crisanba</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 12:16pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 5:07am<b>1x1x1x1</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 10:57pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 11:41pm<b>incendiaaa</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 4:50pm<b>michelledoogles</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 1:43am<b>oj101</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 5:27am

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Polkadot_492's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

#21242605
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21276) - you deserved it (2500)

On 08/21/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34845) - you deserved it (7129) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to get my hair cut. My stylist had the greatest tattoo of a rat on her arm. I spent the whole appointment thinking about how cool the tattoo was, and what an interesting person she must be to choose such a thing. So I complimented her on it and she said, "Oh it's a wolf." FML

#21239690
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34802) - you deserved it (5982)

On 08/17/2014 at 11:19am - misc - by Etrius (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to awkwardly grab my pink dildo after my husband's friend asked what it was that my dog was chewing on. FML

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

#21238336
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16716) - you deserved it (32282)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm - money - by thoughthewasjoking (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44590) - you deserved it (4372)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and every time he asks about my genitals, he winks at me. FML

#21237829
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35841) - you deserved it (3089)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was chatting with the cute new receptionist at the gym. I told her that I would be going there more if she was there. She looked me up and down and said that I should go regardless. FML

#21237096
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32494) - you deserved it (13262)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:46pm - health - by fatty (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37199) - you deserved it (8819)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36120) - you deserved it (21959)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

#21234388
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33595) - you deserved it (3035)

On 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by weirded out (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43748) - you deserved it (5353)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35007) - you deserved it (11302)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

Today, I finally felt ready for intimacy with my boyfriend, and I sent him a sexy picture of myself topless. He texted back, "Ewwwww." FML

#21232655
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41045) - you deserved it (6574)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel

Today, I fell asleep in the doctor's waiting room. When I woke up, the room was empty, and there was a $1 bill tucked into my cleavage. FML

#21232452
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35493) - you deserved it (5926)

On 08/08/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by freakedout (woman) - United States



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