Pelvispresley

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Pelvispresley

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1116
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 40 posted

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Pelvispresley's page activity

Visits<b>alfalfalaffa</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 8:19pm<b>ArcaneBullshit</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 3:57am<b>bruh_that_suks</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 5:43pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:03am<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 10:29am<b>frozenlover218</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 7:41pm<b>babygirl0214</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 6:26am<b>stryggzy</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:30pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 6:11pm<b>XArmyof1x</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 10:20am<b>AnimeRules1125</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 7:55pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 12:57pm<b>KingOfTheBurgers</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:07pm<b>LickedTeeth</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 10:13am<b>lydiaterry</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 12:58am<b>Cristoforo</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 3:18am<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 7:34pm<b>99centPiss</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 5:34pm

Fucked!<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 4:29pm

Pelvispresley's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of Pelvispresley's badges

Pelvispresley's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran out of my usual hand lotion that I use for 'me time'. I instead decided to try and us my after shave lotion as a replacement. Apparently, my member doesn't agree with one of the ingredients, and has now swollen to the size of my fist. FML

by Metime / 11/04/2009 at 11:17pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I came back home to meet people before going away to university, including my ex and her new boyfriend. We broke up about two months ago and there were no bad feelings between us, so I decided to have a chat with them. I asked "How long have you been going out?" He replied "Seven months." FML

by H4rd_Man / 11/01/2009 at 2:02pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Love

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2009 at 1:19am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I broke my mother's Tiffany lamp from the 1920's. Practically crying, I raced onto the computer to try to find one to order before she comes back in three weeks. The lamp is worth over twelve thousand dollars, and the only way I'm getting one is if I lived 90 years ago. FML

by someexplanationrequired / 08/03/2009 at 1:24pm / Canada (Ontario) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to see a movie. He said he was busy that day, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me is making out and kicking my seat. I turn around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML

by frankfukhergood / 07/09/2009 at 1:49am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML

by PiZzA_FaCe / 05/29/2009 at 5:09pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, after taping 5-year-olds do a skit at an improv camp, I used the camera's view-finder to zoom in on a female co-worker's chest. Another female co-worker tapped me on the shoulder to show that the TV was still connected to the camera. Parents, kids, and instructors all witnessed it. FML

by Noname / 03/13/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 5:20pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, I'm reading in the subway sitting one leg over the other. An old lady sits down next to me. After quietly examining me for about two stations she leans over to me and whispers in my ear: "Girl, sitting like all the time will make you end up with a crooked c**t". I'm a man. FML

by jcc / 02/24/2009 at 3:31am / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Transportation

Today, my roommate has gone home for the weekend. She forgot to turn her alarm clock off. Her door is locked. FML

by leez / 02/01/2009 at 5:43am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text from my roommate asking me if it was cool that my ex was coming over to console him because he's sick. FML

by dammed / 01/27/2009 at 2:41pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boyfriend asked me to set up his new Mac and transfer all the pictures from his old notebook. Seems like he forgot that when he went on vacation 2 months ago he took pictures of him getting it on with another guy. We've been together for 3 years and just moved in together. FML

by theamericandream / 01/25/2009 at 8:07am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I put my paint brush into my cup of tea. FML

by Petridishoflove / 01/20/2009 at 1:12am / Hong Kong / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my next door neighbour screaming as if someone was trying to slice her throat. Her window was open. Intrigued, I went onto my balcony and asked if everything was okay, and if she needed anything. She and her boyfriend shout back in unison: "We're F*ing, go away". FML

by ehbe / 11/27/2008 at 3:52am / Intimacy