Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

PandaSmile

Search for a member

PandaSmile

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5258
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About PandaSmile : PS3: PandaSmilexD

3DS: 4957-2820-6096

I also have a vast collection of plaid shirts and swatch watches, which is fun.

PandaSmile's page activity

Visits<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 4:26am<b>hailey2649</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:57pm<b>thepurplewalrus</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 1:39pm<b>umerin</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 5:21pm<b>k007dot</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 5:59pm<b>Kalipczo</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 12:50am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 10:25pm<b>Bobbi_que_sauce</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 6:25pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 1:11pm<b>CptBarker</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 10:38pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 7:49am<b>ryanpmcg</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 4:54am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 4:06am<b>sybyabraham</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 10:48pm<b>rdenkewicz</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 4:16pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 3:35pm<b>rks01</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 3:33pm

PandaSmile's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of PandaSmile's badges

PandaSmile's favorite FMLs

Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML

#18078195
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25333) - you deserved it (3679)

On 10/26/2011 at 1:43am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

#18072283
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31558) - you deserved it (2628)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:04pm - kids - by mew - Canada

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

#18067303
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38731) - you deserved it (2967)

On 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by KaySchrages92 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at my mom's wedding, I tripped as I was walking down the aisle. I was holding the train of her dress. It ripped. FML

#18057412
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27910) - you deserved it (3682)

On 10/23/2011 at 7:58pm - misc - by TitMunch - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML

#18052574
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50612) - you deserved it (3950)

On 10/23/2011 at 7:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43576) - you deserved it (2911)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47037) - you deserved it (15021)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, for our 3rd anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML

#18014393
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48381) - you deserved it (4402)

On 10/18/2011 at 10:16am - health - by stdpositivenow (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant with my boyfriend and his family. After the meal, we all decided to open our fortune cookies and read them out loud. On mine, it said "You will change your mind many times before settling down." I didn't realize what it meant until after I'd read it to them. FML

#18009557
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22461) - you deserved it (4204)

On 10/17/2011 at 8:16pm - love - by pupitre (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML

#18005142
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50969) - you deserved it (4721)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:02am - love - by bubba - China

Today, at my job in the cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like you. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML

#17999888
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28766) - you deserved it (5663) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm - work - by Mayabie - France

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28744) - you deserved it (5922)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38571) - you deserved it (3864)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML

#17981660
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27363) - you deserved it (1951)

On 10/14/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: