About PandaSmile : Socially awkward. Here is my awkward twitter @emma_boyers I like wild boars.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16147) - you deserved it (28379)
Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8557) - you deserved it (66078)
On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States
Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36941) - you deserved it (2822)
On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24112) - you deserved it (4003)
On 11/22/2011 at 8:00pm - intimacy - by Gabriela -
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27755) - you deserved it (4475)
On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I discovered my wife and I have referred to our two-year-old as 'cutie' or 'beautiful' so many times she won't respond to her own name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9588) - you deserved it (26556)
On 11/21/2011 at 1:23am - kids - by BadFather (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21057) - you deserved it (5850)
On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I was working the graveyard shift as a security guard. I fell asleep in my car doing paperwork around 2 am. When my supervisor came to check on me, he pounded on my window, wearing a "Scream" mask. I panicked and pepper sprayed him. Too bad my window was closed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11711) - you deserved it (22002)
On 11/10/2011 at 6:40am - work - by copshop - United States (California)
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24153) - you deserved it (16841)
On 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad was putting seasoning salt into his mashed potatoes, when the lid came off and poured a ton of salt into the pot. My parents hate wasting food, so we still had to eat it. I think my taste buds are broken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25243) - you deserved it (1758)
On 11/09/2011 at 12:32pm - misc - by deviable - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I discovered that my dog is an aspiring underwear designer, her latest project being creating crotchless underwear. Mine seem to have been used as prototypes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19779) - you deserved it (2574)
On 11/09/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by blacktyaffair - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't follow her latest fad of becoming a goth, which involves dressing like an undertaker's haunted hearse and putting on eyeliner. Last week she was into Reggae and beanie hats. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22783) - you deserved it (9339)
On 11/09/2011 at 7:27am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32250) - you deserved it (2826)
On 11/08/2011 at 9:01am - kids - by possiblyoverweight (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35971) - you deserved it (6095)
On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my recently ex-girlfriend's mother called me regarding her baby girl, saying, "If you mess with the chicklet, you mess with the momma hen." I have no idea what the hell this means for my future, but I'm a bit scared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24110) - you deserved it (3704)
On 11/07/2011 at 2:20am - love - by roadkill0321 - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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