About PandaSmile : 🍷🍫⛵️
PandaSmile's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
PandaSmile's favorite FMLs
Today, a man came up to me and asked for a $50 bill in change? Being a good man i said "sure." I gave him the change and he gave me the $50 bill. As I walk into starbucks to buy a coffee, I handed the casheir my fifty dollar bill, she called the cops. It was counterfeit. FML
by supermanj76 / 05/03/2009 at 10:12pm / United States (Florida) / Money
Today, my 6 year old granddaughter was sitting on my lap playing with the rings on my fingers. After a moment, she pointed to a gold ring with many jewels and said, "When you die can I have that one?" FML
by itswhateverr / 05/03/2009 at 12:16am / United States (New York) / Kids
by prego / 04/29/2009 at 10:03pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I hinted at getting it on towards my wife (it's been 2 weeks since we last did). She answered with "no I'm to tired", within 2 minutes she said, "I'm gonna go use the treadmill". She got all hot and sweaty for about 30 minutes, but it was with the treadmill. FML
by tripb101 / 04/22/2009 at 2:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Love
by RockedSystem / 04/22/2009 at 1:39am / United States (Alabama) / Work
by anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband and I were talking about names for our expectant child. I told him since I named our daughter he could name our son. He's decided on a name from 'God of War'. My son is going to be named after a make-believe cartoon character - Kratos. FML
by Anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 12:43am / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, my boyfriend decided to take me to dinner to meet his parents. As we pulled into the restaurant valet I saw a woman in a slutty dress and hooker heels get out of the car ahead of us. I jokingly asked if we had accidentally pulled into a strip club pointing to the woman. It was his mother. FML
by SuperBunny / 04/20/2009 at 3:59am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
by yuckspider / 04/19/2009 at 8:17pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals
Today, my family and I went to a beach where you could swim with dolphins. I was a little scared to swim with them so the trainers had a 5 minute chat to me about how they were harmless creatures. Once I got in, the dolphin attacked me and bit me. FML
by Anonymous / 04/17/2009 at 7:49am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Animals
by tvaladie / 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation
Today, I tried to sneak up on my girlfriend who was sitting in her car with one of her girlfriends. I snuck up to the driver's side window and tried to startle her by banging on the window. The window was down. My thumb went right in her eye. She has to wear a patch for 2 weeks. FML
by shiftybizniss / 04/16/2009 at 2:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health
Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML
by lanbon182 / 04/10/2009 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I was at the beach walking on the boardwalk without a shirt on. Two cute girls are walking my way and I decide to try and impress them by flexing my abs. While I flexed them, I accidentally let a fart out that everyone heard. Everybody, including the girls, laughed hysterically at me. FML
by gotmon3y / 04/07/2009 at 12:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Love