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NothernNightmare

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NothernNightmare
  • Town/Country : Tartarus, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1750
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About NothernNightmare : shhhh, can you hear that? that's the sound of me not caring.

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NothernNightmare's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML

#19945004
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15006) - you deserved it (24149)

On 07/16/2012 at 10:38am - kids - by oops123 (woman) - United States

Today, when I woke up, I noticed something crawling on my bed. A white faced wasp was dragging the corpse of a rather large spider. I'm not sure what I was more disturbed about; the fact that the wasp was dragging something twice its size, or that these bugs even live in my house. FML

#19942968
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21092) - you deserved it (1567)

On 07/15/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by klanciee - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML

#19939596
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31039) - you deserved it (36472)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by oops - United States

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

#19938552
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30241) - you deserved it (3259)

On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

#19937636
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3630) - you deserved it (35095)

On 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, I woke up naked, duck taped to the wall with no memory of last night. FML

#19935617
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9110) - you deserved it (29077)

On 07/14/2012 at 1:49am - misc - by tapeissticky591 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I stumbled across my ex's blog. Apparently, while dating me, he realized he was gay. Good to know the one guy I've dated, lost my virginity to, and fell in love with, was never truly attracted to me and was dating me just to be sure. FML

#19860254
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27844) - you deserved it (2316)

On 06/28/2012 at 11:28am - love - by FMlovelife (woman) - United States

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I've been in love with for three years. Her response was to well up, start crying, and ask me why I had to have chosen her. FML

#19850692
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23592) - you deserved it (2271)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:18pm - love - by Oraashi (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML

#19848904
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7166) - you deserved it (23180)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, at a party, I told a joke to my crush. He didn't even smile. An hour later, I heard my model friend tell the exact same joke to him. He said it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. FML

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, another car slammed into me. By the time I got out to assess the damage, the other car was empty and there was nobody in sight. Either Moby Dickwad was abducted by aliens mid-crash, or he was behind on his insurance payments. FML

#19840064
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17921) - you deserved it (1107)

On 06/24/2012 at 4:51pm - misc - by Boar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

#19817936
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20010) - you deserved it (5500)

On 06/20/2012 at 10:09am - animals - by anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

#19817936
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20010) - you deserved it (5500)

On 06/20/2012 at 10:09am - animals - by anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my sister asked me if I was going to be getting married "for real" this time, because she didn't want to waste her money like she did on my previous engagement. The reason that one didn't work out in the first place is because she slept with my fiancé. FML

#19797334
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42755) - you deserved it (2007)

On 06/16/2012 at 3:03pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I tried to go to the gym, but I ended up watching cat videos on YouTube for three hours. FML

#19791305
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7748) - you deserved it (24698)

On 06/15/2012 at 7:27am - health - by latino14 - United States (Maryland)



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