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Offline (the 03/16/2015 at 11:16pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6220
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About NothernNightmare : shhhh, can you hear that? that's the sound of me not caring.

NothernNightmare's page activity

Visits<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 12:05pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 6:00pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 6:16pm<b>xxhdxx</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 9:27pm<b>Therid</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 2:45pm<b>RoseBlack123</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 9:34pm<b>NicholasLanier</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 5:33pm<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 3:45am<b>hailstorm187</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 7:04am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 10:49pm<b>Kyle1dc</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:12pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:39pm<b>zandalee</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:55pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:22pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 6:49pm<b>Setareh23</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 2:43am<b>ksks1234</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:38pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 3:18pm

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NothernNightmare's favorite FMLs

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Geek

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

by pooplife / 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

by Drafrica / 10/13/2014 at 6:20am / South Africa / Intimacy

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals

Today, I can't go on watching season 8 of The Big Bang Theory, not because of the steady decline of the show's quality, but because I can't stand Penny's new haircut. FML

by shelookslikemiley / 09/23/2014 at 8:48am / Australia / Geek

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2014 at 2:56am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

by anonymous / 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2014 at 10:18pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

by embarrassed / 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

by Degueusement / 08/18/2014 at 12:48am / Intimacy

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople / 08/11/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

by weirded out / 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

by Face fucking palm / 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous