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About NoWayLady : I read FML when I'm blue, red and in between, which would make me purple if you think about it.
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Taday mah boyfriend and I decidd to have a little "fun" in our secludd backyard. It was only after we had finishd that we noticd the three little girls,ho live next door, jumping up and down on thier trampoline, with thier mouths wide open. FML
Today , I went to see a play. I'm pregnant , so I always ned to pee. At intermission , I ran to use the bathroom , but there was a really long line. I askd the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She respondd , ( You don't look looool pregnant! ) , and lecturd me about lying while I ped mah pants. FML
Taday I lerened explosive diarrhea is real !! I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket !! 10 feet in.!! !! liquid poo started spewing down mah pants legs !! 150 feet to go !! I ran !! It ran !! They watched !! After 15 minutes of cleaning.!! !! I slunk out !! Now.!! !! I have to fine a new market.!! !! maybe a new town !! FML
Today I Found Out That Mah Mother Cheated On Mah Father . It Turns Out She Had A Drunken One Night Stand With The Manager Of The Restaurant That Mah Parents Own And That I Work At . The Same Manager I Have Been Secretly Sleeping With For Over Six Months . FML
Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two yeres fir his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come cuz I am seven months pregnant an flying is dangerous in the thrd trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids.
Today, I went home early from a business trip to find my house coverd with rose petals. Thinking it was a romantic notion from my boyfriend, I went up to the bedroom. I opend the door to find him lying there, getting it on with my sister. FML
Taday I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower , I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower , instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower , making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML
Today, mah wife came home from work early and told me she'd been frd. She was really upset so I told her how much she means to me and how much I love her to help cheer her up. She then told me she was caught getting it on with another employee. FML
TODAY, I MET BOYFRIEND'S MOTHER 4 THE FRST TIME. SHE GREETED US HOLDING A BABY, AND I TOLD HER HOW CUTE HER SON WAS. SHE TOLD ME THAT IT WAS HER GRANDSON. TURNS OUT BOYFRIEND IS THE FATHER. WE'RE 16. BIG FAT FML
Friday 27 March 2015