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NoDontKillMe

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NoDontKillMe

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1765
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About NoDontKillMe : *・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・'(*゚▽゚*)'・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*

NoDontKillMe's page activity

Visits<b>MissEris</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 9:50am<b>aclark2523</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 8:56am<b>tripwire234</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:56am<b>CTPope74</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:41pm<b>Snugmybaby95</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 1:44pm<b>InfernoVivo</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 10:51pm<b>weedluver</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 6:04am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 3:35pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 12:31am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 1:43am<b>J355E</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 10:25am<b>MOLLMcAWESOME</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 1:17pm<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 5:08am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 1:36am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 8:23am<b>AlyssaSoccer</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 5:16pm<b>gdduncan</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 6:49am<b>KhrystallDaBest</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 3:06am

NoDontKillMe's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of NoDontKillMe's badges

NoDontKillMe's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

#20759193
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24634) - you deserved it (63631)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to a coworker that "the little red X" next to the email title she's been pushing out of curiosity is actually the delete button. Then, I had to restore the dozen emails she'd deleted even after I told her to stop. She's a manager. I stock shelves for a living. FML

#20758316
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39501) - you deserved it (2194)

On 07/01/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that getting wasted before finals is not a good idea. I sat down in the test hall, reached into my bag for a pencil, and found instead three baby carrots and a spoon. FML

#20757745
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18965) - you deserved it (59104)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48878) - you deserved it (3134)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML

#20754226
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40559) - you deserved it (2396)

On 06/29/2013 at 12:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I've come to the conclusion that my phone addiction is getting out of control after I typed my PIN code into the microwave. FML

#20754108
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25199) - you deserved it (35853)

On 06/29/2013 at 10:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to change the language setting on my phone to Mandarin. Unfortunately, neither of us knows Mandarin, and we can't change it back to English. FML

#20753667
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40413) - you deserved it (8002)

On 06/29/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by damniphone - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

#20752893
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49860) - you deserved it (5740)

On 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm - work - by DocKreso (man) - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)

Today, I was pretending to talk on the phone with my wife just to avoid to speak with my boring coworker. After two awkward minutes of him waiting in front of my desk and me inventing a call, he handed me the disconnected phone cable and left. FML

Today, my cousin thought it would be cool to put a firecracker in an abandoned birdhouse. Before I could tell him not to, it exploded and about 30 wasps came after me like the wrath of God. FML

#20749556
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49210) - you deserved it (4662)

On 06/27/2013 at 12:27am - animals - by EpicJman2828 (man) - United States

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

#20749220
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25544) - you deserved it (32219)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by blahblah (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I rode my motorcycle to an appointment and parked in the parking garage. When I got out, some ass had pushed my bike from the spot and had boxed it in between the wall and his car. Apparently, he felt he deserved the spot more than me and didn't care if I wanted to leave. FML

#20748752
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39248) - you deserved it (3464)

On 06/26/2013 at 4:49pm - misc - by MadMax - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I rode my motorcycle to an appointment and parked in the parking garage. When I got out, some ass had pushed my bike from the spot and had boxed it in between the wall and his car. Apparently, he felt he deserved the spot more than me and didn't care if I wanted to leave. FML

#20748752
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39248) - you deserved it (3464)

On 06/26/2013 at 4:49pm - misc - by MadMax - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I rode my motorcycle to an appointment and parked in the parking garage. When I got out, some ass had pushed my bike from the spot and had boxed it in between the wall and his car. Apparently, he felt he deserved the spot more than me and didn't care if I wanted to leave. FML

#20748752
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39248) - you deserved it (3464)

On 06/26/2013 at 4:49pm - misc - by MadMax - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML

#20748170
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42792) - you deserved it (3206)

On 06/26/2013 at 10:08am - money - by weneedthatmoneytoliveon (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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