Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MysticAmmu

Online | Search for a member

MysticAmmu

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11153
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's page activity

Visits<b>stuckintime</b> - yesterday at 9:50pm<b>Ironic_Meme</b> - yesterday at 8:27pm<b>je_suis_petit</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:09am<b>Kasparkilo05</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 2:38pm<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 8:55am<b>schmuckjon79</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 7:49pm<b>Colon_Man</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:52am<b>lola4455</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 7:54pm<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:08pm<b>potatomanjr</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 2:28am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 8:26pm<b>Jessica00</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 12:35pm<b>8Dirty1</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 1:24am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 11:53am<b>kansah</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 5:34am<b>Dccj456</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:19pm<b>MrConcise</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:32pm<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 10:41am

Liked!<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 11:32pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:59am

MysticAmmu's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of MysticAmmu's badges

MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27380) - you deserved it (3213)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I popped into the shower hoping to come out all warm and clean. Something was very wrong with the pipes, and I came out smelling like sewage instead. FML

#21315541
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27563) - you deserved it (2555)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by ohray - Turkey (Ankara)

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32409) - you deserved it (5314)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML

#21313388
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36945) - you deserved it (4335)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm - misc - by pubemilkshake - United States (Utah)

Today, at the fast food joint I work at, I had to climb into the children's play area and chase out two horny teens who thought it was an appropriate place to stick their hands down each other's pants and fool around. I don't get paid enough for this shit. FML

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42334) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

#21310320
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28533) - you deserved it (5095)

On 12/02/2014 at 7:56pm - animals - by allykat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I received a package from my deployed husband. It contained a scarf, a letter, and a bag full of his pubes. FML

#21310077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31677) - you deserved it (3510)

On 12/02/2014 at 12:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got broken up with. In a text message. She texted my grandma, who then had to forward said text to me. I got broken up via grandma. FML

#21310030
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38333) - you deserved it (2635)

On 12/02/2014 at 10:42am - love - by braceforcarnage (man) - United States

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

Today, the school counselor asked me to leave the grief counseling group for the death of my sister. Apparently, I scare the others. FML

#21309843
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32721) - you deserved it (2094)

On 12/02/2014 at 12:30am - kids - by notmycircus (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45913) - you deserved it (11857)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got friendzoned by three different women. Each girl suggested I should ask out one of the other two women who also friendzoned me. FML

#21309350
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31970) - you deserved it (9127)

On 12/01/2014 at 9:37am - love - by foreveralone (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

#21308801
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32847) - you deserved it (4232)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my wife was giving me a blowjob when I foolishly asked her how she got so good at giving them. She looked straight into my eyes and replied, "Practising on about six guys before you." FML

#21308641
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31070) - you deserved it (18202)

On 11/30/2014 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • FML's badges: pointless but essential!
  • If you're a regular on FML, it probably means that you're a member. Whatcha mean you're not a member? Right, for a start, run along and create yourself an account. Doing so will allow you to comment on…

Monday 23 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: