About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.
If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.
I'm also from Thailand and Norway.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, my cat woke me up, but not by kneading on me though. Instead, she woke me up by pouncing on the laser pointer my dad was shining on my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14397) - you deserved it (1453)
On 05/24/2012 at 5:18pm - animals - by XxEmoWolfiexX (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21646) - you deserved it (4400)
On 05/22/2012 at 1:05am - intimacy - by chchboy (man) - United States
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37001) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31306) - you deserved it (2939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet. A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6119) - you deserved it (6552)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to excuse myself from the classroom so I could have a quick wank. This was because I somehow got extremely horny during a lesson on frog reproduction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7942) - you deserved it (24035)
On 05/09/2012 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by polimeros (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)
Today, I got an inconvenient erection while at my girlfriends house, so I tried to think of something stupid to get rid of it. I tried thinking of Pokémon, which actually made me harder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17968) - you deserved it (7446)
On 05/07/2012 at 4:38pm - intimacy - by me (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23117) - you deserved it (2471)
On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)
Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10056) - you deserved it (29166)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States
Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23631) - you deserved it (1288)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)
Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6735) - you deserved it (18197)
On 05/03/2012 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by anonymous4991 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26495) - you deserved it (7177)
On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States
Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25104) - you deserved it (5454)
On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States
Today, I went to the bathroom to pee. I looked at the toilet paper after I wiped and saw a spider on it. It was still wiggling its legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21103) - you deserved it (2301)
On 04/21/2012 at 4:36am - animals - by yikes - United States
Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17657) - you deserved it (1204)
On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
