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MysticAmmu

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MysticAmmu

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9667
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's page activity

Visits<b>kansah</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 5:34am<b>Dccj456</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:19pm<b>MrConcise</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:32pm<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 10:41am<b>Ironic_Meme</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 9:53am<b>hung060694</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 10:54pm<b>Horsempeg</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 2:16am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 10:07pm<b>poppunkette</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 12:44am<b>gunnerette</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 11:53pm<b>patrickeli</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 5:16pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 5:51am<b>zschul1118</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 10:16pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:54pm<b>Posthuman</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:42pm<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:54pm<b>adrian1910</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:53pm<b>Carnage23</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 7:42am

Liked!<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:59am

MysticAmmu's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of MysticAmmu's badges

MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

Today, the school counselor asked me to leave the grief counseling group for the death of my sister. Apparently, I scare the others. FML

#21309843
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32666) - you deserved it (2091)

On 12/02/2014 at 12:30am - kids - by notmycircus (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45453) - you deserved it (11763)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got friendzoned by three different women. Each girl suggested I should ask out one of the other two women who also friendzoned me. FML

#21309350
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31940) - you deserved it (9120)

On 12/01/2014 at 9:37am - love - by foreveralone (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

#21308801
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32822) - you deserved it (4231)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my wife was giving me a blowjob when I foolishly asked her how she got so good at giving them. She looked straight into my eyes and replied, "Practising on about six guys before you." FML

#21308641
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30948) - you deserved it (18122)

On 11/30/2014 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my little sister asked if she could play on my laptop, but I said no because I was writing an essay for school. She then bit herself hard and showed the mark to our parents, saying I did it. As they bitched me out, my sister got on my laptop and deleted my half-finished essay. FML

#21308491
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40604) - you deserved it (2566)

On 11/30/2014 at 12:48am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I bought a Santa hat. After wearing the hat for a few hours, I noticed a strange lump near the tip of it. I stuck my hand inside to dig out the mysterious object. It was a dead cockroach. FML

#21308445
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30185) - you deserved it (2977)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML

#21308219
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36231) - you deserved it (5857)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

#21308095
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38516) - you deserved it (4676)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:28am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friend made a fake account on Facebook, pretending to be a girl, and posted my phone number on a sexting group. I've been getting calls and text messages from horny weirdos all day long. FML

#21307548
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32437) - you deserved it (3748)

On 11/28/2014 at 1:43pm - misc - by bullah007 (man) - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, while at work, I really had to pee. Since my break was soon, I decided to hold it as another customer came to my till, but I didn't see she had 3 trolleys full of food. It took ages to scan all of it, and when I left for my break, I had an empty bladder and a wet seat. FML

#21307515
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31637) - you deserved it (6729)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:27pm - work - by I'm so wet, baby - United Kingdom

Today, I went to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. I watched as my uncle and his girlfriend snuck off to the bathroom together, where they stayed until someone else tried to get in. When they came out, she was wiping her mouth. I need new eyes. FML

#21306928
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35793) - you deserved it (3041)

On 11/27/2014 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by Trainer Calypso - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

#21306286
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38229) - you deserved it (3158)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

#21306254
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35807) - you deserved it (5959)

On 11/26/2014 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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