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MysticAmmu

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MysticAmmu
  • Town/Country : Norway
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3793
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's last visitors

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MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (2176)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML

#18496344
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (2286)

On 12/12/2011 at 6:17pm - intimacy - by flowerchildd2 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

#18467751
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40304) - you deserved it (4928)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8731) - you deserved it (67993)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7344) - you deserved it (68925)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7344) - you deserved it (68925)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

#18451653
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11914) - you deserved it (39006)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States

Today, my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my ass while I was brushing my teeth. FML

#18449583
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32725) - you deserved it (6312)

On 12/06/2011 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by Surprisebuttsecks? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss. Turns out, the medicine he gave me for my head has memory loss as a side effect. He then said "I told you. Don't you remember?" After I said no he said "I figured." and giggled. FML

#18424721
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24164) - you deserved it (2155)

On 12/04/2011 at 2:04am - health - by memoryloss (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33464) - you deserved it (7314)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27394) - you deserved it (3489)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40573) - you deserved it (4757)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I was leaving Wal-mart, a huge group of birds settled along the wire above the street. I thought it would be hilarious to scare them, so I stuck my head out the window and screamed. The birds responded by simultaneously shitting on my car in very neat rows. FML

#18384349
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5616) - you deserved it (45209)

On 11/29/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by birdfoooo - United States

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27090) - you deserved it (14179)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

#18342381
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11941) - you deserved it (43175)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States



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