Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MysticAmmu

Online | Search for a member

MysticAmmu

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Aalesund, Norway
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 July 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 18090
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About MysticAmmu : My username is MysicAmmu, even though I meant to write MysicAmmy :/
I hate to write typos.

If there's anything you want to know about me, PM me.

I'm also from Thailand and Norway.

MysticAmmu's page activity

Visits<b>jonomc</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 11:36am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 2:51pm<b>Blee864</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 10:36am<b>_minifty</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 10:50pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 6:45pm<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 2:28am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:45pm<b>jansdrs</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 11:07pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:13pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 4:41am<b>dom_g</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 1:50am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 1:14am<b>JustMe1600</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:35am<b>moron011</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 12:38am<b>killjoyx</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:37pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:31pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 2:40pm<b>resilientsoul</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 9:10am

Fucked!<b>_minifty</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 4:50am<b>jansdrs</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 5:07am<b>Blee864</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:31pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:41pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:27am<b>tralulilulalala</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 9:12pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 10:04pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 12:07am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 1:19pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 11:32pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 1:59am

MysticAmmu's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of MysticAmmu's badges

MysticAmmu's favorite FMLs

Today, I shared with my doctor that I still feel uncomfortable with my medication. She expressed surprise, saying, "Really? By now I would've thought it'd be routine." Sorry, no. In three months, I have not gotten used to sticking a syringe up my butt and injecting my rectum full of medicated foam. FML

#21522878
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18108) - you deserved it (1398)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I've been calling my pet snake "Mr. Snake" for two years now. I decided to look up the name, and boy do I regret it. It turns out Mr. Snake is a porn site. I've named my snake after porn and have been introducing him to family with that name for two years. FML

#21521480
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16612) - you deserved it (4053)

On 01/31/2016 at 2:32pm - animals - by GeeLoftus - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

#21520882
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18414) - you deserved it (3241)

On 01/29/2016 at 5:18pm - misc - by I Tried (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was diagnosed with a condition that makes me lactate. I'm a 6' tattooed guy with a boxing competition coming up soon. I'm never going to hear the end of this. FML

#21520387
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21873) - you deserved it (1556)

On 01/28/2016 at 11:26am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

#21520327
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22975) - you deserved it (1503)

On 01/28/2016 at 3:39am - animals - by sweetie808 - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was walking to class. While waiting at the crosswalk, a guy cat-called me from his car. I guess he was pissed that I didn't respond, because he purposely drove through a puddle and completely soaked me and the expensive textbook I was holding. FML

#21519651
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20566) - you deserved it (1475)

On 01/26/2016 at 12:05pm - misc - by Soakedandbroke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

#21516257
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20501) - you deserved it (3240)

On 01/17/2016 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my fiancée was asleep, so I decided to spoon her from behind and cup her boobs to wake her up nicely. She responded by yelling, "THE TOAST!" and elbowing me in the face whilst still asleep. FML

Today, I finished reading a manga series on a website I go on all the time. As I read the last page I got a huge celebratory message from the website saying I was the first one to read every manga on their site. The website opened in 2011 and has over 30,000 manga. My God, I need a social life. FML

#21514123
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21473) - you deserved it (6173)

On 01/11/2016 at 9:47pm - misc - by Lesser spotted female gaming nerd (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a call from my dad asking if I was a porno actress. I am. FML

#21510678
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25326) - you deserved it (22328)

On 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found the engagement ring I'd bought and been missing for a week. On my girlfriend's hand. While my childhood friend was inside her. They apparently like pretending she's married while doing this. They made this self-discovery a week ago. Good for them. I don't want the ring back. FML

Today, my dad got drunk and decided to fix everything in the house he thought was broken. Now the oven won't cook, half the floorboards from the stairs are piled in the garden, we put the TV back together but now it is stuck on mute, and we still have no idea where he has put my bedroom door. FML

#21509147
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20336) - you deserved it (1265)

On 12/29/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by bob the builders pissed off daughter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were going to my grandparents' for Christmas. As my car was totaled recently, I had to get a ride with them. They left without me in the time it took to put my shoes and socks on. FML

Today, I was bitched out by my shrew of a mother for getting engaged, to a man. She's not homophobic, but rather pissed off because gay marriage is "trendy" and she wants me to be "above that nonsense". Hurray for love. FML

#21506801
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21936) - you deserved it (3348)

On 12/23/2015 at 4:06am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: