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Murphy_21

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Murphy_21
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 February 1988 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 23406
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About Murphy_21 : My life is a giant fail... but not as bad as some of these guys. =]

Murphy_21's last visitors

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Murphy_21's favorite FMLs

Today, I received in the mail a hockey puck autographed by recent hall of fame addition Steve Yzerman. When asked, I had to explain to my 4 year old brother that someone famous had written his name on it. Later, I discovered that my brother decided it needed his name on it too. FML

#3156844
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37796) - you deserved it (4444)

On 06/23/2009 at 9:28pm - kids - by lumi (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave I decided to give him one last thrill. So I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out, when I asked why, he points behind me, my mom watched the whole thing. FML

#3143292
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21015) - you deserved it (53211)

On 06/23/2009 at 11:14am - intimacy - by wastedlove (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom went to a psychic. The reason? She has convinced herself that I'm gay, even though I've told her that I'm not and never have been. The psychic disagreed. Apparently, I'm bicurious with one of my guy friends. Guess who my mom believes? FML

#3137659
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48912) - you deserved it (2938)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:28am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 9 year old nephew found his way onto my iTunes. I now have 401 songs titled "aidfj3P" by "ffjiel". FML

#3115220
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51390) - you deserved it (6101)

On 06/22/2009 at 9:32am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, I told my dad I was going to Walgreens and asked if he needed anything. He needed condoms, and that I should call him when I get there so he can explain the kind he likes. FML

#3113124
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60190) - you deserved it (4699)

On 06/22/2009 at 5:03am - intimacy - by fml (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything I replied "guess". He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently I've been bitchy. FML

#3112345
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14819) - you deserved it (63259)

On 06/22/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by tamp (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I was shopping for my little sister's birthday. She loves manga. I've never read manga, so I bought a couple of novels from the "popular" shelf. Turns out if they have white covers it means they are "adult" books. I bought my sister a "lolicon" manga - filled with prebuscent naked girls. FML

#3097066
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30887) - you deserved it (18355)

On 06/21/2009 at 6:10pm - kids - by loli-conned (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, at about 1 a.m. I got a drunk text from my girlfriend thanking me for the amazing sex last night. I have been out of town for 3 days. FML

#3068602
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59262) - you deserved it (3218)

On 06/20/2009 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by desocrates (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

#3055426
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11777) - you deserved it (83790)

On 06/20/2009 at 7:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, I had a big craving for a popsicle so I went to a convenience store and bought one. On my first bite, my upper lip got stuck to it. I ripped it off and spent the next 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding from the giant cut I'd put in my lip. It hurt too much to finish the popsicle. FML

#3051182
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32788) - you deserved it (9310)

On 06/20/2009 at 1:47am - misc - by mk (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML

#3036778
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36258) - you deserved it (4527)

On 06/19/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML

#3030130
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9127) - you deserved it (38580)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:34pm - misc - by crap (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss came over to my desk and struck up a casual conversation about movies. After a while, he sat on the edge of my desk, nodded toward my chest, and said in the same casual, lighthearted tone, "And nice cleavage today. Keep that up." FML

#3028643
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46766) - you deserved it (9896)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:32pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a bath in the bathroom we are currently renovating. There's a big hole in the middle of the floor. When I got out of the bath, I swung one leg across the gap to get a towel from the rack. I drew back my leg and looked down to see my brother's hot friend staring up at me in horror. FML

#3025655
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41946) - you deserved it (17810)

On 06/19/2009 at 9:51am - misc - by ilikeirishducks (woman) - Italy

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

#3019033
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9215) - you deserved it (87763)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)



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