About MrSassypants : I am a football playing king in space.... with a mustache.
Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 22 years old. I am 16. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18224) - you deserved it (1142)
On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)
Today, it was my birthday. I finally got the PS3 I've been asking for, for a long time. When I opened the box, I didn't find a PS3, but a bunch of clothes that my mom put in my brother's PS3 box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18272) - you deserved it (2765)
On 11/10/2012 at 4:02am - misc - by Shauna (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I noticed my husband was acting moody, and I asked him what was wrong. He replied that he didn't know, so trying to lighten the mood, I facetiously said, "It's 'cause you're stuck with me, isn't it?" He nodded, trundled off, and hasn't shown his face since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15645) - you deserved it (2603)
On 11/09/2012 at 9:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16543) - you deserved it (1956)
On 11/09/2012 at 7:30pm - kids - by john r.t. (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (15213) - you deserved it (1937)
On 11/09/2012 at 7:16pm - health - by dating a fking cnt (man) - Canada
Today, we found out that the beloved "Uncle Jimmy" from my early childhood was really the man my mother was cheating on my dad with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17504) - you deserved it (841)
On 11/09/2012 at 3:53pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Gisborne)
Today, after a year of living with my boyfriend at our new place, he told me that he wants to sell our house and live in a trailer, so he can be closer to his mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14644) - you deserved it (1419)
On 11/08/2012 at 4:22pm - misc - by Anonimo (woman) - Italy (Sardegna)
Today, my newly ex-fiancé, the father of my 5-year-old child, moved out of state with no warning. I just spent my last $500 paying off his car, and the rent is due tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16222) - you deserved it (3917)
On 11/02/2012 at 12:35pm - love - by lilithfaye (woman) - United States
Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15527) - you deserved it (996)
On 10/31/2012 at 1:23pm - animals - by orilykid (man) - United States (California)
Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14698) - you deserved it (2191)
On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom decided to wake me up by pouring ice cold water on my face. Again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14165) - you deserved it (2751)
On 10/28/2012 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my cat played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13097) - you deserved it (3814)
On 10/21/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I purchased a brand new television. Not long after the professional who hung it on my wall left, it came crashing down on my hardwood floor. I'm now left with a busted TV, a tear in my living room wall, and a severely drained bank account. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16495) - you deserved it (1602)
On 10/20/2012 at 6:48pm - money - by fuck gangnam style in the anus - United States (California)
Today, for the second week in a row, my brother woke me up in the small hours of the morning begging me to help him figure out the math problem to turn off his phone's stupid-ass app alarm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15034) - you deserved it (1247)
On 10/13/2012 at 6:25pm - misc - by fucking fratricidal (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I left the hospital after having knee surgery. While trying to find my balance on my crutches, I was holding onto the roof of the car. My mum slammed the car door shut, not noticing my hand. I can barely even bend my fingers to hold onto my crutches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17248) - you deserved it (893)
On 10/07/2012 at 1:43am - health - by badluckbrianna (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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