MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

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MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 35447
  • Number of comments : 2317
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>seba7236</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Pikawarrior</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 6:19am<b>ForeverSushi</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 3:21am<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 4:30pm<b>Camlin93</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 4:56am<b>noisyassassin</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 10:43pm<b>Yahboi1</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 1:53pm<b>TheLadyOpal</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 4:14pm<b>airriderz15</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 3:37pm<b>wecantfixthat</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 3:27pm<b>toolazytotype99</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 3:04pm<b>tintarroja</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 2:17am<b>KayDee29</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 2:09pm<b>slappygecko</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 10:55pm<b>tigerisabelle</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 7:21pm<b>KaneCR</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 6:24pm<b>BakedBanana</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 10:44pm<b>walker9879</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 10:26am

Fucked!<b>seba7236</b> - one hour ago<b>Pikawarrior</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 12:19pm<b>airriderz15</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 9:37pm<b>toolazytotype99</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 9:04pm<b>tintarroja</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 8:17am<b>BakedBanana</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 4:44am<b>walker9879</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 4:26pm<b>Goat_E_mom</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 10:06pm<b>AirMelon</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 7:39am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 11:58am<b>Natttie</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:51pm<b>JETarchitect</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 2:42pm<b>ima_rock</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:25am<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 3:47am<b>Lonelychick1249</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 3:21pm<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 11:26pm<b>kitkatjoy_96</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 4:16am<b>BrainEaters</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 7:48am

MrSassypants's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, my son told me that he doesn't need to go to school because he doesn't need a job. It turns out he plans to get a life sentence in prison and live the rest of his life at the taxpayers' expense. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 12:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I found out my son told his teachers that I make his brother Tom sleep on the floor, make him stay out of the house for long periods of time, and don't let him use the toilet. Tom is actually our cat. FML

by Bad Mother / 10/08/2015 at 7:53am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Animals

Today, at a soccer game held by my girlfriend's family, some idiot went to kick the ball, missed by a mile, and hit the ground hard. So I started a slow, sarcastic clap. I got a load of angry looks, followed by verbal abuse when we found out he'd split his head open on the ground. FML

by -_- / 10/07/2015 at 7:29am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML

by spiderbaby / 10/06/2015 at 3:43pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

by ouch / 10/05/2015 at 3:20pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his parents' house when things started getting hot. Out of respect, we stopped and just cuddled, making us able to hear his parents banging. FML

by ph2222 / 10/05/2015 at 1:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up in the elevator of my apartment building in the middle of the night, without my keys, phone, or shoes. Turns out I have been sleepwalking. FML

by YumeWolf / 10/03/2015 at 7:01pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend was shaving his beard in the bathroom when I left. An hour later, I found him exasperated after having shaved half his body. I had to help him shave every nook and cranny left because he said he was in too deep and couldn't turn back. Yes, his bumhole too. FML

by NothowIimaginedmyday / 10/03/2015 at 12:00am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was running late for work. I forgot my name tag and work hat at home, but my boss is pretty laid back, so I wasn't worried about it. Five minutes into my shift, the district supervisor walked in for a surprise employee inspection. FML

by illuminatzi / 10/02/2015 at 10:32pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I was sitting outside in a pair of shorts. After about 15 minutes of getting weird looks from people, I realized my cock was sticking out of a hole that wasn't in my shorts when I put them on. FML

by soulaar / 10/02/2015 at 10:22am / Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 8 years moved in with two other women. He's spent the past 2 years telling me he can't afford to move out of his parent's house. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2015 at 11:08am / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Love

Today, I took my dad out shopping. I managed to pull into a really cramped parking spot and said, "Man, that was a tight squeeze." My dad then looked me in the eyes and said, "So was your mom." FML

by Nick Pat / 09/30/2015 at 9:13am / Miscellaneous

Today, I got called a "politically correct loser" by a woman at the supermarket, all because I said I didn't want to find out the gender of my baby until birth. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2015 at 6:18am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML

by Guy / 09/28/2015 at 2:49pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous

Today, a 60 year old veteran hit on me by pointing to his white hair and saying: "Just because there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire down below." Then he told me vets eat free at Cracker Barrel. FML

by Bex98 / 09/28/2015 at 12:31pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.